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Resisting the Urge to Cut Yourself

In my blog, “How to Quit Cutting for Good”, I talked about 3 alternative coping strategies for self-harm: Talk it out, wake up to your actual feelings, and seek God. 

Once you decide you’re committed to stop cutting, you will find out what a struggle it is to go sober and stay free from this horrible addiction.  Even as you are beginning to recover, you still will feel the cravings to cut again. You are going to need to be prepared to know how to deal with those powerful urges. Here are some practical ideas to help you or someone you know be set free.

Stop feeding the cutting monster – wait it out

Every urge you have to cut will go away in time, but only if you don’t act on it. Each time you act on your urge to cut, you’re making that urge stronger kind of like feeding a monster. Each time you feed the addiction, the more likely you will feel the urge to cut the next time you feel the same emotional pressure. The more you stand against the urge, without giving in, the more your urges will decrease.

Distract yourself from the desire to cut

One of the best ways to stop cutting is by distracting yourself with someone or something else. This will allow the moment to pass when you’re feeling the deep cravings to cut and get your mind off of it. It’s impossible for your mind to think about two things at the exact same time. Here are some ideas on how to do this.

  1. Call a friend or meet them in person. Talk about what’s comfortable for you. The key is to keep talking.
  2. Take a shower. This will help invigorate your body so physically it too is distracted. (Make sure there are no razors in the shower).
  3. Exercise Walk, run, ride your bike, climb, swim, do yoga, etc. While you are exercising, your mind is more likely to think about something other than cutting.
  4. Play with a pet. Take your dog for a walk.
  5. Watch television or a non-violent, healthy movie.
  6. Make yourself a sandwich, drink a glass of water or a cup of hot chocolate.
  7. Listen to positive music. It will definitely help to change your mood.
  8. Write in your journal. Learn to express your feelings through writing.
  9. Create art or some kind of creative hobby.
  10. Volunteer somewhere like a nursing home, or a hospital. In fact, getting a job will help as well. Some people cut out of sheer boredom.

Natalia put it this way: I still fight the urges, but the way I deal with it is by writing in my journal or talking to my best friend and boyfriend who are currently helping me through this.

The point is: Find something else to do. If none of these ideas are possible at the moment, try finding a substitute for the cutting sensation.

  1. Rub an ice cube on your skin, instead of cutting.
  2. Wear a rubber band on your wrist and snap it when you feel the urge.
  3. Draw on your skin with a red marker or food coloring in the place you would normally cut.
  4. Put temporary tattoos in the places you have the urge to cut.

Angel said rubber bands have helped her. I’ve learned that snapping them against your wrist takes away a little bit of the amount to want to cut yourself. Ali said the key for her was she needed something physical to feel like she was still alive, that she was OK. So, I mark a little pink heart on my calendar for every day I don’t cut…and believe it or not it helps. Help is possible and stopping is realistic.

Tell your story

The biggest problem with a cutting addiction is it forces you to focus on how YOU are feeling.  Stop thinking about yourself so much and focus on other cutters who need your help.  The more you can reach out to others, encouraging them to find better ways to express their feelings, the better you will be able to resist your own urges. Courtney said: I’m proud to be able to tell people my story of overcoming my self-destructive behavior. Every day is a struggle, but I always choose to find hope in the darkest situations and fight the urge.

Think About your Future without Cutting and Self-Harm

You have an incredible life ahead of you, filled with many, many years of potential joy and time with people you love, and who love you as well. Think about what you’d like your life to look like in 5, 10, 15 years, and start taking steps to move forward in that direction.

Abby is 25, and she sees hope in her future: If I don’t stop cutting, then a lot of the things I want aren’t going to work out the way I dream they will.

Cyndal said: I thought about when I have children, and they see the cuts and scars on my arms, and they ask me, ‘Mommy what are those booboos on your arms?’ That really made me think, ‘WOW, what would I tell my children?’ And it made me cry for a really long time”

I want to encourage you to be strong like Amanda. She said: It’s a challenge every day, but I am fighting to not cut, because I know that my life can be really awesome, and cutting does not fit into that picture. When you feel your emotions building up, remember you now have alternatives to self-harm. Get self-help by talking to someone who cares.

Be strong. There is tremendous hope for you!

  1. It’s hard to fight the urge but this helps. my friend was cutting and that broke my heart.she stopped, but I’m getting the urge now.all this stress isn’t helping.

    • my friend started to cut and she told me, then i realized how stressed and sad i was and then i started. try the advice above, it really helps. after two years of cutting im finally free.

  2. I need help.. My urge makes me feel like my whole body has an itch that I can’t scratch away. Nothing provokes my urge, it just kind of happens.. I’m not sure what to do. There’s no one I can go to. My family and friends don’t help, nor does thinking about something else. I can’t stop this physical itch

    • I fully get how you feel. You should fully seeing it by marking every day if you did and why. Seeing it fully will show you how much of a habit it is and how much its hurting you.

  3. Our HopeCoaches understand how powerful the urge can be. Please give us a call so that we can listen and connect you with one of our partner resources. There is Hope for healing. Call TheHopeLine: 1-800-394-4673 (HOPE)

  4. My best friend cuts sometimes. Whenever she does, she tells me after she did it. When I ask her why she’s feeling depressed, she says she’s just feeling stressed and feels that everyone is always mad at her. I told her that our friends only got mad at her because they care and didn’t want her to get hurt. I also told her how I usually cope with stress. She isn’t very good at expressing her feelings. She only talks to me about her feelings. She also takes prescribed medications for depression. She doesn’t feel comfortable talking about her feelings to anyone else. If the advice in this blog doesn’t work, I don’t know what to do. I really want to help her and it breaks my heart to see her like this.

    • I’m 13 and am currently trying to quit cutting, from the sound of it I am in the same position as ur friend. I have told my best friend and honestly all I want from her is to know that if I were to disappear she would care enough to come find me. When I first told her she cried for 20 minutes over it, I told myself I had to stop for her sake so just let her know that u care about her. Encourage her to get help and just be there for her throughout the process just remember that stopping is hard once u’ve started to cut so it will take time.

  5. i understand I’m that way to but I find it easyer when I try to put myself in a place where I can’t or won’t cut, then I put my blades in a completely different area where they won’t be in a close to reach area that I can’t think about cutting again. You may think that your friends and family don’t care, but my friends keep telling me ‘ we all have someone. That persons we may not see daily,but they do care.’ Remember that. I still have to think of that person all the time. That person may be the only reason your looking for help. Think of that person whenever you want to cut.

  6. I am 14 years old and currently stopping cutting….. but not fully. I wake up every day with the urge but I try to avoid it. Some of the littlest things can make me feel suicidal or depressed and I don’t know if its a “teenage thing” or something. I just don’t feel safe in my state of mind. I am getting help though and also, thank you so much for the tips.

    • This is exactly how I feel so often. I actually went through anxiety that I was just messed up and weird. I never told any one about it. About my scars or the moments where my anxiety was almost too much to handle. It sucks to remember and know I could have gotten help much earlier. I am very glad you took the steps instead of the path I took 🙂

  7. Everything is working out perfectly, i don’t know why the urge to cut won’t go away. It’s like my body needs to feel the pain, i need to see the blood, i have to feel the pain, i can’t go without it, i need to feel the relief, but nothing is wrong? Why won’t it go away?

  8. Hi Jenny,
    Cutting is a hard addiction to overcome without help. We have some resources and a great partner at TheHopeLine that could help you. How about talking to a HopeCoach at 800.394.4673 or chatting online with one at http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp Here is a link to a resource page for self-harm that may help you too: http://thehope.dm/selfharmresources Here is a link to an eBook that will help you with ways to overcome the urge to cut: http://thehope.dm/selfharmebook Jenny, you are never alone in what you are dealing with. We are here to help.

  9. I’m 13 and I am on depression meds. I self harm and have tried to stop… Every cut pushes me further away… I don’t know what to do anymore… Does anyone even care anymore?

    • I care. And I’m not a computer or any of that. I really have been in your position and on my bad days, I’m still there. But I care about you and your well-being.

    • Hi, I just wanted to tell you that I love you. I actually do. You’re not alone, please don’t forget that. And I beg you to talk to somebody. It helps so much to get your thoughts and worries off your chest.
      I love you,
      Nicole.

    • Im 15. Ive been cutting since i was 9, ive been on meds since i was 11, hun, if you just keep your mind to it, and keep trying, you’ll get clean. I dont really have much room to speek, but every time i stop, i keep thinking about how i want to stop, and the time spand keeps getting longer and longer between each relapse, and hopefully I won’t do it again soon. Just keep trying love.

    • I was on Lithium and some other medications. Honestly, the medications made it worse for me. I had to take control of myself. Don’t get me wrong, I still struggle with the concept of cutting every day, but the medicine didn’t help so I stopped taking it. I just think of all the bad things that could happen if someone saw the cuts. I didn’t care what would happen to me physically, but I cared about the other people. I cared about those around me. I stop myself by pausing and thinking, “what would happen if someone saw my cuts?” I can understand the thought that these are just fabricated responses recycled to help, but this is my personal response. I am actually typing this at work. You posted this eight months ago and probably will never see this, but I hope someone does and it helps them somehow. With all of the love and best wishes I can muster,
      -Joshua

      • I’m “supposed” to be on lithium too but I feel like it makes it worse I haven’t cut since January but I’ve still been getting worse but just like you it’s the thought of “what if someone saw them” that is what stops me from cutting but it’s comforting and unerving that there are others like me so thank you even if you never see this

  10. Kara, We care about you. You don’t have to do this alone. We have HopeCoaches available 24/7 to chat online with you at http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp. We also have a great resource we can give you to help you with cutting. This is a link to a resource page on Self-Harm that may help you as well. http://thehope.dm/selfharmresources

    • Thanks but your probably a computer programmed to say you care…

      • Kara I understand what u r going through, its hard I get that, but I have learned that my life would be so much better without cutting.

  11. Kara, We really do care about you and that’s why we’ve been doing this for over 20 years…for young women and men, just like you, searching for hope and someone to listen to them. You are not alone, call or chat with a HopeCoach anytime day or night. Talking about what is going on in your life will help. 🙂

  12. i’m 30. ive been using self-harm to cope since i was 11. i cut, hit my head, pull my hair, drink, and do other random things to cause myself pain. i get so frustrated and half of the time i really do just want to curl up and die. im tired of everything. life isnt fair, and i know it isnt supposed to be, but no matter how good i do or what positive changes i make, i still always seem to lose. i lose everything and everyone. my whole life it seems i have been punished for things i didnt do. i try to keep faith and hope, knowing that i havent done whatever i am being accused of and waiting for the truth to prevail, but it rarely does. the women in salem knew they were innocent, but at the end of the day they were still burned on the stake. thats how my life goes. i know im good, but what does that matter if the rest of the world doesnt and treats me accordingly? i keep losing.

  13. I cut tonight.. i cant feel anythimg unless im in pain.. My heart feels so tired.. I can’t fall asleep.. when I go to sleep I think of when I held my eyes shut as I was being forced to do unspeakable things.. I don’t feel human anymore.. I can’t think.. I can’t breathe I don’t want to do this anymore

    • Hey add me on fb or something I’m always here even tho I’m going through the same thing I’m here

  14. I’m 12 and I self-harm but no one gives a crap……And I don’t feel like stopping anyway….

    • Erina , i am in the same position. I am 12 too. I cut pretty often, on my shoulders usually but nobody cares. When they ask me that why I am depressed, I just avoid the question.

  15. I’m 13 and i cut, i’ve been seeing medical help but nothing has been working. I’ve lied and would steal blades from my dad. I need some distractions but i can’t seem to find any.

    • You there ?

    • I’m 13 and I’ve been cutting a lot lately bc my mom died and my dad left and ppl treat me like crap and I honestly have no idea what to do anymore. I cry at night a lot and have tried to kill my self more than once…. I need help but nothing works.

      • i know how it feels my parents left when i was young i feel as if the world is crashing down around me a small piece of me seems to die when i cut but i cant stop because then ill feel nothing

  16. im also 13 . i recently started cutting
    when i told my closesed friend she cried.i dont want to make her cry…….
    she is a good friend.i love cutting tho>i cant stop<every time i think about it i get the over welming urge to

  17. I’m 14 years. Three people from my family found out that I was cutting because of my scars. I could’ve lied, saying that my dog had done it, but they already knew what self harm is, so obviously they wouldn’t believe me. I am extremely depressed and I don’t know what to do with myself.. except cut. But since they had found out, I can’t cut or else I will get medical help, and I’m afraid of that because I hear it’s a hell house. I know one person in my class knows I cut, because I catch her looking at my arm, but it’s obvious that she doesn’t care. Nobody cares about me in school. But right now I’m trying to fight the urge to cut, but it’s too difficult. I don’t know what to do. My life is a mess. I can’t even talk to anyone. I literally don’t have any friends. My family won’t understand. I have nobody.

  18. so I recently told my friend I cut, and she has an eating disorder too. this made us want to stop together, but it’s hard because I care about her more than myself. I want to do this for us though, and we are going to fight it together!

  19. I am 14. I started cutting about a year ago. Lately, I started to do more things that made me happier. I read and wrote books, I listened to music, and I watched so many YouTube videos. But even then, I knew I was just denying the inevitable for a few moments at a time. Because I could hold off the beast only long enough when my friends or people were around. At night, in the darkness, and when the silence fed me bittersweet lines about my existence as a human, I would cut myself. Until I started the Butterfly Challenge. It is when you draw a butterfly on your wrist or wherever you cut. The rules: You can’t wash it off, it has to come off naturally. If you cut yourself, the butterfly dies. And underneath the butterfly, you write things that either make you happy or make you want to stay alive. I would write family and music and books. I even named my butterfly Hope. When Hope was gone, I did the Butterfly Challenge again except this one was called Hally, which is a German name that means ‘strong one in war.’ The next was called Anabelle, a Latin American name that means ‘beautiful.’ The next Carol, a French name that means ‘melody or joyful song.’
    It’s been six months since I last cut and my current butterfly, Serenity, is slowly fading. But I know that the next butterfly will help save me just as all the others have.

  20. I’m 11 and I cut I also have friends that cut and I tell them to stop and I also want to stop I need help and I also want to help them

    • Im 15. Ive been cutting since i was 9, ive been on meds since i was 11, hun, if you just keep your mind to it, and keep trying, you’ll get clean. I dont really have much room to speek, but every time i stop, i keep thinking about how i want to stop, and the time spand keeps getting longer and longer between each relapse, and hopefully I won’t do it again soon. Just keep trying love.

  21. Hi. I don’t cut, mostly, I use scratching, pinching, punching and well anything I can that doesn’t leave a really noticeable mark and that still gives me the relief from the pain. I have made it four hours without cutting, punching, flicking or anything else and It’s hard, really hard. I’m trying, I almost threw away my razor though. during the daytime, I feel happy, I laugh at jokes, I smile then during the night, at 3am when I’m all alone in the darkness, the urge rises, the urge to grab whatever is closet and inflict pain. I’m trying to stop but I don’t know If I can, I just wanted to wish good luck to all those trying to quit out there.

  22. I am 13 i started cutting last year when i was 12 i was doing as i was getting bullied stupid me i did it kn my arm and a teacher found out i started doing ut on my shoulders the urges come and go but my mate eric has been stoping me i aska friend at school if theg look bad he curses at me when i do and tells me i am beatiful we r notexactly great friends but be is there he belped me through hafdtimes and when he thinks i am down at school he will come and knock for me to distract me he kniws what i am like nd he knows hows to stop me i am not aloud to be friends with hi apparentky cuz his best friend hates me but he does not care he is aleys there fore me i did start and do the rubber band and then drawring i staryed writting songs on my arm and now rub ice cubes when i needto but the urges slowly go x

  23. I seem to be older than most of the commenters before me but I have cut off and on for the last 10 years 🙁 I struggle everyday and give in most days. I have tried other coping skills or distractions but the only thing that helps is spending time with my best friend but now she is in jail and I’m lost without her :'( I don’t know that I’ll ever be able to stop. The urge is too strong

    • I too am older than most commenters as well and know what you are going through. I’m 28 and have been cutting since I was 16. I’ve seeked professional help, but it hasn’t stopped the urges. It did help reduce the number of times I cut. I find it helpful to try to take deep breathes, count slowly (sometimes i count to 10, sometimes I make it to the 50’s) and re-evaluate the situation at hand. I ask myself is cutting going to really be a solution to my problem. Will it change things? And sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn’t. Good luck and I wish you the best.

      • im about to be 28 too and ive been cutting since i was 14, since i was 21ish ive managed to only do it a few times a year under great moments of stress an depression. ive really tried to work on not letting my moods overtake me, understanding bad days come and go and have found ways to distract myself and get away from anything sharp if i feel that urge. within the past 3 years ive gotten even better to where it only happens about once every year, i still can’t believe i struggle with this at 27. I did it today, worse than i’ve done in years, i was just so frustrated, angry, and raging from a fight i had just had with my boyfriend, he had hung up on me and i was feeling so alone, being so self critical and harsh, just making myself feel so pathetic and gross, and i lost it on myself, punishing myself on both calfs. i certainly calmed down after i did it, but when i “came to” i couldnt believe i had lost myself so much in my feelings, and the damage i had done. Its embarrassing, im supposed to be a grown ass adult, but i still feel so weak and wrapped up in my emotions sometimes, but i do feel like its unacceptable. im super harsh on myself and others at times, but def. more myself. heres what i hate the most about still doing this even if its seldom.:
        *after ive cut i know at some point my boyfriend will see what ive done and he’ll be appalled and disgusted, and ill have to explain myself
        *hiding the cuts from my mom and family and hoping they dont see them and try to ask if i need help
        *making sure the scars are always covered/hidden until i can get them to fade with scar creams
        *still doing this as an adult makes me feel so immature and low..the quick satisfying feeling is always replaced with a feelin of wtf is wrong with you? your not supposed to still be doing this. why is it i cant be a grown up and handle my emotions properly?
        its embarrassing.
        *not being able to say ive gone a year without cutting
        what do others do to help not be so harsh on themselves? like i just feel so low that i still can not be done for good with cutting.

  24. I started cutting when i was 11, i only cut for about 7 months before my mom bought me short sleeved clothes and i knew that i couldn’t hide my scars forever, and lies about my cat or dog wouldn’t last long. It has been about 4 months since i was determined to stop, but it has been really hard because when i started cutting i would only cut once a day, but then as it got worse i cut on my arms and stomach, and it has been really hard even though i haven’t made a mark in about 2 months. i still get really bad urges and wonder what would happen if i actually told someone that i need help. I dont think that it would go over well because my parents dont even know i have depresion, and i know that none of my friends would care. I just wish there was some way to stop quickly. ):

    • Sonya, I care. I’ve been cutting myself since I was about that age as well…I did it a few times a day and it only kept getting worse.I started cutting my entire arms both arms as well as my thighs…Yesterday I had the biggest urge to cut myself again and I did so…this time I cut my stomach.
      I cut deep this time, deeper than I ever have and it scared me…but gave me adrenaline and a high that I enjoyed…but then after a few hours It really started to hurt but it felt good because every time I had the urge I would just put pressure on the cuts and that would do me over until I could go home and cut…I rarely brought a instrument to cut myself with so I’d always wait until I got home.
      My parents found out that I had done this at the age of 13 and tried to get me help…tried to have me talk to a priest…but they just didn’t understand…none of them did. It made things worse. But there have been very few who do understand. Like people who cut themselves and have experience with it.
      It’s sort of an addiction. Cutting comes with a nice enjoyable high that only lasts for a while.Then you become guilty because you can’t tell anyone and if you did how would they react right.
      I still cut myself and I’m scared because I don’t want to stop.

      • I am so sorry about this. If you ever need help, I’ll be here to talk.

  25. I’m 13 and I’ve never cut before but today I had serious urges to take the scissors and start cutting. I’ve had depression for a few months, and I have anxiety. I don’t k ow what to do. Every time it goes away, it keeps coming back later on. I feel like none of my friends actually care about me and no one would care if I were gone.

  27. Unique,
    I was the same age as you when I started to cut and it seemed that I was never going to get better or the urges were never going to go away. As I read your post, I know that there is hope but I do not see an end to the means. I have felt the same way as you when I am alone in the darkness. I have gone to some very dark places and the only thing that made it better, at least for a moment, was to take that blade and cut. The feeling of euphoria and seeing the blood trickle from my body, always made things better. Instead of a butterfly, I have drawn a heart with my little sister’s name in it. I am going to try this and thank you for posting this idea, however; I have not cut myself in 4 months, but the urges are getting worse so this is something good to try. I will let you know if it works.
    Thank you,
    Rachell

  28. I need help with the urges. I have not cut in 4 months, but the urges are getting worse. I need some ideas other than drawing something on my wrist ( which is a good one by the way). How do I stop the feeling of wanting to harm myself? Where do I go from here? Please help me?

    • It really helps to talk with someone when you feel the urge to cut. Our HopeCoaches are available 24/7 and we have email mentors who can help, too. You are not alone. https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  29. Is continuously scratching your face and picking at it considered self harm

  30. I was 13 when i started self harming. I’m 16 now and it has been 2 years since i last cut and hopefully more years to come 🙂 but there has not been a day where i didnt feel the urge to cut. Recently i’ve been hanging out with a couple of new friends that i met from my old ones, although they are nice, they make me feel like an idiot. The urge to cut is much stronger now and although we skype 24/7, i feel isolated. I was planning to talk to one of them about my urges but i’m scared that they won’t understand and judge me.

  31. I cut when i was 14 yrs old and then it slowly got worse, by the time i turned 15 i thought about it everyday. I had the urge to feel something because i felt nothing. I was in a three year relationship that was hell even though i was young i also was always getting hurt by the people i loved at a very young age about 7 years old i wont go into deep detail about that. I tried to hide it from everyone i would sit in my room and pretend i was sleeping i would shut my door and cry and cut all night. because i was embarrassed i didn’t want anyone to worry about me and make a scene, but finally someone noticed….. my little brother. I was so mad at myself i could not forgive myself i didn’t want my brother to see me like that. One night i hit rock bottom i toke a hard look at myself and i thought of my brother i wanted to show him that life can get better even though i had very little hope for myself. I started finding ways to help me stop like running,listening to music, studying things i wanted to learn about. But i am not going to lie urges still came but i slowly got better little by little. I am know 16 yrs old and haven’t cut for 5 months i am doing a lot better i broke up with my ex boyfriend a month ago and had no contact sense it is hard but i am getting through it.I am finding things i love to do and going for it. Always keep moving foreword and striving for your dreams. NEVER GIVE UP.

    • Thank you for sharing your story of hope! You are brave and courageous.

      • I just hope i can help someone fight the urge and get them help because its truly amazing how life can change. Even if your at the point of just giving up on everything. I was there at one point in my life people just need to understand how critical it is to keep moving foreword and work on them self. You cant expect to get different results if you keep doing the same thing over again. Yes getting help and talking to someone is a good step forward, but it really comes down to you.

  32. I was eleven or twelve when I started. It wasn’t cutting per se but injury. The cutting soon followed. I thought it was regarding rejection of a boy that was really a date rape but it became more. Never enough for someone,never enough. I became stronger around age thirty and now near fifty I’ve fallen back. I remember more, I think, and I don’t want to know the truth. If it is true I believe that person was trying to make amends. If I tell is it worth hurting so many others. Jesus forgave the sinner. I have sinned also.bwhat is the answer

  33. I haven’t cut in almost 9 years, but tonight is a huge struggle. I know I won’t do it, but I miss it so damn much! I cut for over 20 years, and still bear the scars. I hate that I still don’t have a way to deal with stress that’s as relieving as cutting.

    • Does it never stop? Do you always want to do it? I need to know that this goes away.

  34. i used to cut when i was younger things were really bad then but i got better, and i stopped for a couple years but my life took a tumble and i started again and i dont know how to stop, the motivation for stopping is gone now. it left with him i guess, and i just want my daddy back i mean i cant even see him anymore and i just feel so hopeless. i know he still loves me and this wasnt in his control, or at least i hope he still does and doesnt hate me for what hes been through which has been my fault i just >_< i dont know what to do anymore

  35. I have anxiety and misguided Anger, as my anxiety has gotten worse I’ve started cutting. It happens in a cycle, the anxiety hits and I blame it all on myself and just want it to go away. So I did what I’ve been resisting for so long, I cut. I did it to cause pain and yet feel relief at the same time.
    Every time The Anxiety hits I have that feeling, that urge to cut. I strain not to but about a month ago it overpowered me and I did it…then again and again. So right now I’m on base one.

  36. I have anxiety and misguided anger (technically I have anxiety attacks and blame everything on myself) and lately they’ve been getting worse. I started wanting to cut. Then I tried but didn’t…then I did. Then I did again and again. Everytime I have an anxiety attack it happens and I need help because every time I see the cuts on my leg I feel something in me that wants more.
    I haven’t found something to help me not do it. My anxiety freezes me up and wears me down when I get that feeling. It’s like I have to resist and try to get myself doing other things but I can never hold off long enough for the attack to go away. Maybe it’s because I’m scared that if I don’t self hem it won’t go way

  37. I am 11. I DONT cut but, I always Want to. People at school bully me. I started to draw where I wanted to cut. With a red ink pen, i would draw lines. They look realistic. Then, the teacher’s and my parents were conserned, thinkig it was real. I blame it on, oh the door scratched me or the cat or a burn from cooking. I need help to STOP thinking about it. At school, teachers get mad at me. Theh almost called my parents. Mom: Oh we can help. Dad: YOU STOP IT RIGHT NOW!!! Stepmom: You are doing satans work! I wish I had less stress. LESS PARENTS MAKING ME MAD ALL THE TI E WHEN I DO SOMETHING WRONG. Anything that can help? My councelor: Aaron White. ( I think.) Please, help. I DONT WANNA START CUTTING LIKE MY FRIENDS. I dont draw cuz of attention. I do it to NOT cut. When I walk throuh those school doors, I just wanna cry. Please, help, nothings working.

  38. I’m 16 and I started cutting when I was 13. I actually just kinda felt awful, so I cut myself on purpose with an eyebrow shaver. It didn’t hurt or show up so I didn’t think it did anything. But the next day I looked at it and I was kind of excited? Like I found a way to express my feelings. I haven’t cut since February of 2015, but now I’m in school and I’m really mad and upset at someone because we had a group project that got my grade lowered. I just really want to see blood and feel the icy metal of the razor. I miss it. So I’m writing this. I hope it’ll go away. I’ll draw out my feelings, and if that doesn’t work, I may end up talking to one of the coaches on this site. I’m praying to God for help and answers as well.

  39. I’m 25 and I’ve dealt with burning and cutting since the age of 11. I can go long periods without even an urge, the longest being 3 years. I still get an urge when things hit rock bottom. I do well to not go through with it because I couldn’t imagine my son catching me in the act. It has been a little over a year since I went through with a cut. It’s really hard and I’ve been struggling lately even more. I just lost my job, I’m afraid I’ll lose everything and because of my son’s daycare schedule finding a job that fits is not easy. I pray that God is just testing me and this is part of the test. I feel like a failure. I brought a beautiful innocent child into a broken home and terrible world. I do my best as a single mother but I have many faults. I get angry with him and I just sometimes feel like he would be so much better off with a family, whole family, that can provide for him things I probably never will. I’m really trying not to sink back into the darkness and find the light but I just don’t know what to do. Cutting takes my mind off the emotional pain and seeing the blood brings me into reality. I’ve never been this desperate to not cut. I’ve never reached out this much. I’ve been in therapy I have many blessings I just feel so lost and I just want to one time to take my mind off things. There is hope and I know that I will pull myself through this trial for my son. I just needed to vent and know that I wasn’t alone. No matter how upset or depressed at least I’m not alone..

  40. Hello Kara, I am 48 and fighting the urge to cut myself now. I started cutting at 11 when my world was left from perfect and I had all these emotions that I couldnt deal with. I quit cutting at 28 and have not cut myself until a month ago, going through a divorce which I filed for but did not want. I was married `13 years and have a way of puushing people and pushing until I have no one left to care. I love my husband very much and now he is cold, distant and wont come back home. All this pain i have and I cant express it, I just know I am hurting and feel like I have hurt everyone around me and deserve the pain. My cutting episodes this past week has left my arm scared top to bottom and my legs, people look at you like your crazy or call you crazy but they dont understand the overwhelming urge to take that emotional pain away by hurting yourself. I understand all to well but I will promise you i will resist the urge if you will

  41. im 12 my mom cought me twice i cant stop i get bullied every day wich is making it harder for me to stay sober

  42. im a 12 year old girl i get bullied every day wich is making it harder for me not to cut my mom cought me twice by seeing the cuts as they got deeper i have 3 huge scars on my wrist and 100 on my rib cage also i got one on my heart , i dont know what to do i feel like just starting again , i dont know what to do i at least always hide it with a smile, my mom says i do it for atention but i dont som days i fell like i will pull the plug andvisit my dead cat but i know i cant im stuck in this world with sadness

  43. i dont think people can stop my sarrow

  44. Hi my name is katherine and im 35 and i am wanting to cut right now and have been on meds for bipolar. I have just gotten out of the hospital in December for my illness and when i came home my job was gone and now i am not finding a job and getting a lot of denial letters. I also am being rejected by family bc of my mental illness. I am currently at the point in my life where i feel like i cant go on and i am wasting everyone ones time trying to help me. I dont know what do my funds are really limited and i have no family to turn too.

  45. I am only 11 years old, and i want to die.
    i cutt myself .

    • Im 11 too and I cut my cutrs aren’t deep but they bring blood to the surface of my skin and I want to stop cutting because it never hurts me but it should hurt me

  46. I haven’t started cutting.. But I think about it almost nonstop and I’m at my breaking point.. I don’t want to start.. I do non-permanent stuff like scratching myself and pulling my hair and pinching.. But it’s not the same. Well I guess I wouldn’t know.. I just don’t know what to do anymore I guess..

  47. Hey, I might only be 16, but I understand. You’re okay. That’s all you need to know. Is that you’re okay. Just focus on the future and you’ll be golden. You’re okay.

  48. Sweetie, first of all, you have a beautiful name. And second of all, it is okay. I’m 16. My little sister is 12 years old and I hear all about the mean kids and drama and sadness. But you need to remember that you’re strong. Youve gone through so much pain, you have to give yourself a break. You need to be happy. And that’s all up to you and your perspective on the world around you and yourself. If you stay positive you’ll be okay. And remember the bright future you have ahead of you. You have so much to live for and you’re so young. You’re so strong and amazing, I hope I can be as strong as you one day. I love you, and so do so many people. It’s okay. It’s all okay.

  49. I am 13 and i struggle with cutting, over dosing and have tried killing myself many times my sister has cancer my Nana just died of cancer and so did my great uncle and I was really close to them both then just before Christmas my granddad and that was it now everyday from then i cut. 2 days ago I made a deal with my boyfriend that I would never cut or at least try to never cut again but its been a struggle 4 me because I’ve been on and off cutting 4 over 4 years now and I don’t know what to do. I think over and over in my head everyday dose anyone actually care about me, would anyone actually care if i actually sic-seeded in killing myself? I don’t know what to do any more and i cant keep relying on my boyfriend because he needs to be with his granddad because his granddads cancers came back

  50. This is the first I’ve spoken out about this. I’ve been struggling since I’m 9. I’m going on 20. I stopped for about a year and 2 months already but the urge is just getting worse every day. I’m breaking down crying in bed/in the shower/in public bathrooms because I can’t handle the urge anymore. I was badly addicted. I wouldn’t go a week without cutting and I stopped cold turkey. I don’t know what to do. I started abusing pills/weed and cigarettes to ease it but it makes me feel shittier and now I have more addictions to deal with. I’m a mental wreck. Please, can someone give me the slightest bit of guidance here on how to cope ?

    • i know how you feel i started smokoing not to cut

  51. I am 11, and I started cutting this year. I am so depressed, and I need to find a way to stop. I am a cheerleader, and cheer season was over a moth ago, so, since then, it has been really hard for me to keep the blades away from my skin.

  52. okay, I have read many if people’s stories and I want to share mine… My name charity, and I am 14 years old and yes I too have cut. The first time I was 10 and I was going through so much, and I kept it all to myself, my parents were breaking up and my only grandma had died, and later on me and my siblings had to live with my grandpa. My parents were drug addicts, and we never had a stable home. I am also the oldest out of my 3 other siblings… My grandpa wasn’t much better, he was a old man that got drunk, worked on cars, ate, and slept all day, so it was just me so I ran the house cleaning and cooking at the age 10, I raised my siblings. My grandpa would be drunk and sit me down telling me I was good for nothing and that I was lazy and I would cry so badly because I knew I was none of those things. When I was 11 my mom came back to live with us she still lived with us and my grandpa of course, then she would be gone for days or weeks and she had me worried sick, I either thought she was in jail or dead because she would lie and say “I’ll be back tomorrow” and it would be 2 weeks, and she never picked up the phone. Eventually I lost trust for her then I lost respect for her. By 12 my aunt sissy moved in, she was about 40, but I loved her to death and she was really cool. One thing about her was she was in and out of jail and she was also a drug addict and she was literally crazy but usually controlled it, until one day it was just me her and the kids she was throwing bowls threw windows, well I called the police and that happened so after than I had to live with my uncle Cory and aunt Beth. I was already knew how they’re house worked but I spent the night there many times because of my cousin Angel ( age 11) and she also had a sister, Kenzie (age 3). We lived there for awhile and I was majorly depressed, but Angel was my best friend so that was a pro… There house was too small for all of us to live in (8 of us). So we moved in with my grandpa, and that was now 9 of us. We soon got used to it and I loved it, but I had some rock bottom break ups and I started cutting again. When Angel saw she would be so sad so I often tried to hide it but we shared a room, I stopped for awhile, for her sake. Soon my grandpa got guardian ship of us again but he kept getting drunk and so I told DSS and they gave guardian ship back to my aunt beth and uncle cory, when he found out he hated me and told my younger siblings that I was spoiled, lazy and stupid, none of those were true, we were all poor, I worked my butt off and I did the right thing. We all lived in the same house but my grandpa saw in his head that him and my siblings were family and all the rest of use were evil. My sibling knew better though but kept their mouth shut, after all I did raise them lol. One horrible night me and Angel were babysitting all the kids (5 kids) and my grandpa was sleeping but one thing lead to another and we had to locked the kids in the bedroom bathroom and me and Angel made a plan to call the police but the house phone was in his room so we planned to run in there get the phone and run right across to where another bathroom was and lock the door, angel was faster than me so she did what we planned and she locked the door. My grandpa kicked the door and the mirror slams against her head and the door opens and theres blood and glass all over the floor, she starts screaming my name telling me to get my grandpa away, I was screaming at him and I ran her to the bedroom bathroom where the kids were and we used emergency call on my cell phone and
    when the police got there they had to take angel to the hospital, so me and the kids we just there with the police and we told them where my aunt and uncle were so they had to track them down and me and when they got there they had to talk to the police and then my and my aunt went to the hospital to see angel and she had to get stiches, and I held her hand tight through it while her mom talked to someone on the phone, on the way back home was quiet expect for my sobbing, when we got home me and angel went to our room and I began sobbing again which also lead her to sob, my aunt had came in and told us to stop and that we weren’t sure if me and my siblings were going into foster care or not yet so we needed to stop worrying. The next day we had to pack our bags and say goodbye to our home, when our caseworker drove us away we all sobbed. As soon as I got a razor I did some serious damage. I had to change my whole life, I even had to change schools, I had major depression… It’s almost been a year since I’ve been in foster care, and that when I met Jesus. There has been some rocky edges and at times I broke and I cut but just know it all gets better, look at my life. I’m not anti-social, and I love helping others with their problems but I often put others before me. Something that really broke me was I had this boyfriend that I could talk to and I told him about my life and he told me about his, I trusted him and we did some things that I know regret but he made me promise him that I wouldn’t cut so everytime I wanted to cut I thought of him and stopped because he gave me hope and happiness… after I got in trouble and couldn’t hang out with him he broke up with me, that day I cut so badly (2 mouths ago). I now realize who he is, and I am over him. I have been clean for 2 moths which is really good for me and I believe anyone can do it! I hope this helps someone in need!! if anyone wants to talk to me about their problems I’m here. Please feel free to talk to me about anything! I love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  53. I want to cut… but I don’t want to upset my family. They think I stopped, but I haven’t. I sometimes think I’m addicted, but I can’t be.

  54. Thanks for coming here for help and for your honesty. Talking about it is really important. Is there someone safe like a school counselor you could tell?

  55. I haven’t cut in almost 6 years, but it’s still hard sometimes. Like tonight, I got so depressed and thought about it, but was able to draw on myself with marker instead. I haven’t had to do that in awhile and it scared me. I feel like no one in my life right now really cares all that much about me or knows/accepts me as I am-and it hurts. I grew up in a rich family and as such certain things are expected of me. My “childish” hobbies (anime, manga, computer games etc) are treated with disdain and I’m made to feel like I need to change myself, dress just so, and have different hobbies in order to gain acceptance. I am a sucessful adult with a degree and a good job at this point but yet I still feel like my families love is and always will be conditional. I think it’s so hard right now because my best friend moved across the country a few months ago-and another friend moved a year ago. This means that at the moment the only people close to me are my family, who are the reason I cut when I was in high school in the first place. I don’t want any “formal” help and so have avoided any hotline because that stuff can be traced back to you and I just want someone to talk to, not to be tracked down and admitted to some stress unit because I admitted I was having a hard day. Do you know where I could go for this?

  56. Sounds like you are an amazing overcomer! Our chat lines are safe, private, and free. We are here to listen and encourage. I am sorry you are going through this season of loneliness with friends having moved away. Please know that you are not alone. We care. https://www.thehopeline.com/GetHelp/

  57. So here’s the thing. It IS like feeding a monster. Try to get it under control as soon as you can. I had self harm behaviors very young (elem. school) but didn’t actually cut until I was 19 & in college. I am still struggling with it because I have just gotten more addicted with time. You wanna know how old I am? I’m FORTY-TWO. If you think people react when you’re 14 & cutting, imagine trying to hide it when you are my age with a career. I wish I’d never started. And while its pretty infrequent now, it still happens sometimes. Get help now. I’m in DBT & have found it to be tremendously helpful.

  58. I’m 15 and i self harm.. I try to stop but i feel like it is impossible to stop, i self harm almost every day and it hurts to know that i’m not normal.. I really really think nobody needs me and it just makes it worse when my crush told me that he doesn’t need me.. It hurt so much that i cut with the words “kevin doesn’t need me” and it was the first time that I used words.. I have been cutting for maybe 8 weeks and its realllly addicting to do it. I do it all the time with pencils, scissors, etc in school and when i arrive home, i take a shower and i cut again.. I’m so horrible

  59. You are not horrible. Thanks for reaching out here. We want to chat with you and connect you to resources that can help. We are here for you 24/7 – https://www.thehopeline.com/GetHelp/

  60. i am a 34yo married mother of 2 boys, 1 15 1 11. they are very aware of my mental illnesses and my cutting. theyve seen the cuts, fresh and scars. theres only so many times i can blame it on the cat. i suffer from bipolar with pyschosis and ptsd along with very severe anxiety and agoraphobia. ive been off my meds for quite some time now bc once i feel well, my illness convinces me i dont need the meds, i am not sick. but then i end up here, where i cant get my mind off of harming myself, trying to occupy myself. im sure ill end up doing it, and im sure ill end up in a hospital inpatient within a month.

    • i really do hope that youre okay

  61. I have successfully avoided cutting for last 3 months and I struggle so much these days… Everyday is hard. I tried everything like watching movies, music, calling a friend, exercise daily but my mind keeps saying to me that nothing can make me feel so good as cutting 🙁

  62. That is a huge success! I am so proud of you for working so hard at it. When you feel like cutting you can chat with a HopeCoach. We are here for you 24/7 https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/ Again, I just wanna say that’s awesome!

  63. Hi, I’m 20 and I use to cut a lot when I was younger. my legs were tore up and I sometimes cut my fingertips. I just want to say that I stopped at age 17 I had started at age 16 but I recently relapsed and I ask for prayer please . I know it’s possible to rise from the ashes of personal despair and fine peace. For the longest time I had that peace. I lost it again but I know in my heart it is attainable . as long as people pray for me I can reach that goal of being back in top form. As long as we pray for each other we will all be back in top form. Brothers and sisters I pray you all find strength as well.thank you for hearing me out and letting me rant online. Loneliness kills man and I’m fighting it epicaly. Please keep me in your prayers…..

  64. I’m 23 now. I started to “mutilate” myself when I was 10.. I would stick safety pins in my fingers..when I turned thirteen I started to take razors to my skin.. This was my way of dealing with the pain inside. I was molested by a family member and when I tried to tell my sister and about it she told me to keep my mouth shut.. My mom overheard and asked me if it was true and I said yes… But she never brought it up again and did nothing about it… Which hurt me even more… I didn’t know what else to do.. I was separated by death from those I was close to at a very young age. Death and sadness surrounded me. Even at church I felt alone and like I didn’t belong, my first boyfriend was abusive and to this day the only one that knows who molested me.. He threw it back in my face and I still don’t trust anyone , doubt I’ll ever open up about it again. This is the first time I’ve ever typed about it. When I first turned 16 I kicked the habit of cutting , don’t remember how. I remember I had a secret stash of broken razor blades in a box and decided to just throw them away, to let go.. I used the rubber band trick and was proud at age 17 to be “fully” recovered. Lately I’ve been thinking about it a lot again and I’m afraid I may start again since I know I can get away with it .. I’ve been having anxiety really bad because my life has been too stressful for me. I have been going days without sleep and then sleeping all day, I can never stay focuses anymore and complete tasks, I don’t care but I do about having relations with family and friends anymore, I’m distant now and appear cold to others , I overeat then starve myself, I pick at my head and my heart beats rapidly for no apparent reason sometimes.. I feel like I can’t do anything with myself. I’m a failure in life. I can’t handle a job in public because I’ll break down, I’ve been in a relationship for 4 years and I love him but want to ruin us so I can be even more unhappy so I can starve myself so I can at least appear happy and skinny. I don’t know what’s wrong or what to do, I’ve seen multiple therapist and one psychologist that I actually liked but he asked me if I was ever molested and never went back. I can never follow through for myself. I am horrible taking care of myself also. I never thought I truly hated myself but now I’m not so sure. I can’t believe that I’m thinking if I cut myself. I’ll be able to finally sleep.. I really shouldn’t go down that road again it’s been 11 years free of that but idk what to do.. I won’t know I’m serious until I do it again. I hope I don’t . All I ask is for whoever sees this pray for me. Please pray for me because I feel so fake on the inside. I feel hollow. I just need some strength to keep away from old habits and prayer to get better

    • Proud of you for reaching out for help. Our HopeCoaches are available 24/7 to chat with you and help you get through this. It’s free and it’s private – https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/ I am praying for you. Please don’t give up. We also have a partner site where you can post prayer requests and prayer champions will pray for you, too. http://www.theprayerzone.com/

    • Dear Alice,
      I’m reading this 15 days after you posted. I really hope that you found the strength not to cut. I haven’t cut in 25 years, but tonight I was feeling the intense desire to, for many reasons… I just drew on my arms with a pen instead. I think you should go back to that therapist you liked who asked you if you were molested. If you liked that therapist and he picked up on this trauma, go back. Go back and talk. Or maybe he can recommend a female colleague for you to go to. We are turning all the hurt and rage back into and onto ourselves, until it’s so overwhelming, we feel that have to cut in order to feel better and release the pain; If we cut, we are letting them hurt us all over again, and they don’t get to. They don’t get to. They are weak remnants of the past. They are mere ghosts of a past we are dragging along with us and allowing them to hurt us over and over again. Let’s not let them. Let’s not hurt ourselves. Let’s be kind and loving and nurturing to ourselves. Let’s be that good Mom we didn’t have. The Mom who would hold us and tell us that we are special and good and worth it. Don’t hurt yourself, Alice, be your own good Mama. Be the Mama you always needed and wanted, the one who would listen and take action and protect you against the world. I know you would make a great Mama, because I can tell that you are sensitive and kind and you need to be that sensitive and kind Mama to your own inner child. Pretend you were your own child and you expressed everything in your post above- What would you say to that precious and hurt little girl?

    • Alice, I don’t know if you’ll ever see this but I want you to know you’re not alone. A lot of what you said here is what I wish I could put into words and I have a lot of the same feelings in my life. I’m also 23 and just recently started self harming again and am struggling to fight it. I’m at the place where I know I need to talk to someone but don’t trust a therapist or psychiatrist either because of past experiences and where I currently live. Stay strong, know you’re not alone and reach out if you ever want to talk.

      • Alice and Amy, you can chat with a HopeCoach here at TheHopeLine about your struggle with self-harm. We are available 24/7 for you and it is free and totally confidential. We also have some really great resources to help you get through this. Just click the “chat now” button or go to this link https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp. We care and we understand.

  65. Hi, my name is aspyn I’m 16 years old and I have been cutting for about 3 years. I currently started putting on a lot of black, I cut my hair really short. And I sneak out of the house a lot late at night and go cut in the woods. I need some tips on how to stop cutting, other than getting help.
    Thanks
    -Aspyn

  66. I’m 14 and I’ve decided to cut myself all together about 3 times and I have problems I don’t belong here I’m just insegnificant nothing that doesn’t know how to be human because I’m just another lame excuse that shouldn’t be here I want to leave and get away forever I’m not needed and the first time I went through cutting at all it was hurt and I fillet the same as I do now because my own dad I hadn’t seen him in years and when I finally went to see him it had been 8 years and he treated me like I wasn’t even there my step moms parents cared more and then I stopped cutting and it got better and then I strayed again in 7th grade for just because and then I stopped again I was so happy and then I relapsed on my problem and I’ve started cutting again and I’m gonna be a freshman this year and it’s because I’m hurt cause I mentally hurt someone else and no win back to my old self idiotic little nothing I want to die and leave this hell hole we call a planet. People treat me like what I am, nothing. I don’t wanna be here I don’t belong here I’m so ready to go but I’d rather someone else kill me I’m so tired so done with everyone I lied to my mom i lied to my sister I even tricked myself that I was happy but I’m not and someone please,just please take it away please.

  67. I’m 18 and i’ve been depressed since 7. I was sexually assaulted by my brother when i was really little, it would happen everyday. He made me learn that it was something that was suppose to happen, and he said he would hurt my sister if i said no. I was stuck in this cycle of fear for my sister that I only had one option. I didn’t know what to do, I was so scared all the time. I first started out putting salt and ice on my skin at 13, which then moved to gouging my skin with my finger nails. When I turned 14, none of that helped i needed more, i would start breaking apart shavers and pencil sharpeners and cutting just enough to draw blood, from there i moved to deeper and deeper until the point my arm would go numb. 16 i started lighting matched and letting it to myself. Then i finally was put on meds for both anxiety and depression. Neither helped. I was hospitalized at 17 and put into northwest journey, which at first just made me so angry all the time. But then things started to get better. I got to the point were i wasn’t self harming everyday, which led to once a week, then i became clean. But only because I started to abuse narcotics, huffing, drinking, and smoking marijuana. I found a different kind of escape. I knew I had a problem and I turned myself in to a rehab facility. I went through the process and became clean, i’ve been clean now from any form of escape for about 5 months. But just recently i’ve been getting depressed again, and i relapsed on SH yesterday, I don’t want to get back into that, so here I am looking for help. Thank you for listening.

  68. Im 13 and I have Bipolar ll disorder. I keep getting really depressed and my mood goes up and down. Today 5 times I considered cutting. I cut once before and it made a scar. Today everytime I wanted to cut I dug my nails into the scar trying to get it opened. Now I dug my nails into my wrist in several spots and my wrist hurts so much. But I just can’t stop. I won’t take meds and I don’t have a therapist. So maybe you guys can help me? And btw my parents have no clue im bipolar, only two of my friends know. This is the first time I opened up about this to others. I hope you guys can help, you seem like a nice community to talk to. Thanks.

  69. Hi, my name’s Adam. I’ve hit the bottom before but I’ve not stopped looking for a way out. I’m 21 and at the age of 18 I had everything. My dream career began as an officer in the Royal Air Force, friends, family, I couldn’t have asked for more. A year and a half ago my girlfriend had 2 miscarriages in quick succession. This really set me back and I began drinking heavily to the detriment of my health. I developed glandular fever as a result of the stress I was under along with my job. I was going to be off work so long it ultimately cost me my job and any way of providing for myself.
    My girlfriend left me, my family shunned me and I was essentially homeless, only staying briefly with what friends I had left. That went on for months and months, I was drinking and cutting and trying to end it all. Every time I try to pick myself up I get knocked straight back down. I’m holding down a job at the moment that I’ve had for a month but the pay doesn’t cover the cost of living and I’m unable to get more shifts. I’m at the lowest ive been for a long time. I’m reaching out here because, without wanting to sound dramatic, I don’t know how long I’m going to put up with it. I don’t eat, i don’t sleep, I’ve no money, no prospects. All I’ve done for 20 years of my life is work as hard as I possibly could and I’ve nothing to show for it. Makes me wonder if it’s worth anything. I don’t want attention or sympathy from anyone, I wanted to get that off my chest to stop me cutting again tonight.
    Thank you
    Adam

    • Hi I’m Ayriana and I feel your pain Im 20 and been to 4 different hospitals and i’m so sorry about your girlfriend and family, just because I don’t know u doesn’t mean I don’t care. I hope everything goes well and you stop cutting and drinking because you deserve life! Stay strong I’m here if you need me..

  70. You have really been through a lot. You did the right thing by speaking out here and expressing your feelings. Talking about it with someone who cares can really help. HopeCoaches are available for chat 24/7 and we have resources to help you. Give us a try – https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  71. im 14 been cutting for 3 years how can i stop my parents hate me no one cares
    im on my own for this i need help

    • Aidan, my name is Bella, I am 18 and have been cutting since I was the age of 11. I was in a bad situation with my biological mom befor I was adopted at the age of 12. I still cut and to be honest with you, it is so hard to stop. But even though I don’t know you, I care about you and I feel for you. I know life is hard and I hope you can get through it. Good luck.

  72. WE care about you. Asking for help is the first step towards healing. Please chat with us on TheHopeLine – https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/ We have resources and we can connect you with people who understand.

    • thanks but I really don’t know if I can stay clean I have started smoking again it helps stop the urge but is this the way to go?

  73. I know how you feel and inside you are a happy person you just have to find him

  74. im here your past seems crap but its now that matters live your life to the full and the past wont haunt you you can speek to me 😉

  75. im 14 and i cut we can stop for eac oter i know how u feel

  76. I have stopped covering my cuts because no one notices and if they do, they don’t say anything.

    • me too

  77. I struggle a lot with cutting so my girlfriend gave me some advice on methods she uses. One that I think helps a lot is to set time goals for yourself. Tell yourself if you can last one day, you can last two days. If you can go two days, try three and so on. I’m now one week clean and I plan on going two weeks next.

  78. I’m a 25 year old man. Over the past year my life has fallen apart. I’ve come close to killing myself several times. The most recent time I started to cut my wrist. I was stunned by how much better the pain and bloody mess made me feel. I don’t know what’s next.

  79. TS, What you describe is the euphoria that comes with cutting. That’s part of the addiction. It’s important that you seek help as soon as possible. Would you chat with one of our Hopecoaches about this? We have an excellent resource that we can give you to help you. Talking about what you went through this past year will help as well. To chat with a HopeCoach go to http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp

  80. Hi my girlfriend cuts, and im trying to help her stop, is there any good advise on stopping??

    • don’t yell at her or demand her to stop. let her know you are there for her and that you want to help her stop. Talk to her when she expresses the need to cut. Also don’t get mad at her if she relapses because it happens and she will probably already feel bad about it. I hope you can help her and be understanding with her and I hope she stops.

  81. i think im depressed i just want to be happy. when im with my bf i feel so happy. but i wake up from horible dreams and have cutting in the back of my mind all the time. i do cut. i try not to because i know it hurts the people around me but i cant. ive been through so much and i dont feel like writing all that down. i just wanted to say this…

  82. Hi, I’m 18 and recently started university, living on my own. Living on my own doesn’t overly stress me out but university does. My family is going through a lot and they don’t really let me help anymore because I need to focus on my classes. I was molested when I was a kid repeatedly for years by a family member, I’ve never posted something like this before. I haven’t cut myself for 2 years but lately my depression has been getting worse and I’m starting to really want to. I don’t want my boyfriend to know because he’s going through a lot with his family too right now. I’ve been on antidepressants for a year and they’ve been working great until now. I no longer know what to do. I’m worried the only reason I’m posting this is a last ditch effort to not cut because I’ve tried everything but the urge won’t go away.

  83. Some Universities have a free counseling office. Have you tried going there to talk to a counselor? It is important to talk to someone about your feelings and situation. You can chat with a HopeCoach from TheHopeLine anytime 24/7. We are here for you – https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/

  84. I am 13 and have a great life. I started to cut halfway through this year when i started getting really depressed and stressed out. I just a few weeks ago stopped, and i felt so proud. I hid my things and keep a rubber band on me at all times. I was doing fine, but today i heard a song that compelled me to cut. I forgot about my rubber band because i was alone and no one would know, so i grabbed a safety pin. The whole time i was like “no no no!” but i did it and REALLY regret it. I just wish i could go back and undo it. Does anyone have any tips on how to mentally stop? ( i still get urges to cut all the time, and mostly i don’t act on them but today I did. )

    • Molly, We hope you get some feedback from the community here. If you feel like you need some additional help with self harm…we have some great resources we can refer you to. A HopeCoach would be glad to listen and help you through this at http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp.

  85. i am getting to the point i have to take 7 different meds and i am only 13 i cut so much cuz all i do is fight with my family and its soo bad i cut all over

  86. i am 13 and i take 7 differnet pills for what i have and i cut myself soo much its gets to my chest and had to beath

  87. I cant stop i tried all of them none o . them worked helps any other ideas? I NEED THEM DESPRETLY!!😓😓

    • Have you downloaded our free eBook about self-harm? It has real stories and even more help in it. Here is the link – http://info.thehopeline.com/selfharm
      And please chat with a HopeCoach anytime 24/7. We have some additional resources to help you. There is hope. 🙂

  88. I’ve never shared how I feel on a website before. I’ve always felt like my problems and stress don’t matter in the bigger picture. I just feel so worthless sometimes. I haven’t cut for months but the urges are getting stronger and I feel like I’ll lose my mind if I don’t self harm. I feel like I’m never good enough at anything I do and I always feel hated, when deep down, I know that someone must care about me. It’s just tough to stay strong sometimes. Normally, I write music when I feel this way but I can’t find any inspiration at the moment. There’s no words that I can place on these feelings. I’m just so tired of everything sometimes but I can’t off myself and I can’t self harm whenever I want to because it’ll hurt my mom. She was just in my room a few minutes ago asking if I was safe and it tears me apart when I lie and tell her that I’m fine while I think about grabbing a razor. She knows that I’ve cut before, but I wish she didn’t. Every time I have a break down, she threatens to take me to the hospital, where they’ll see me as “another depressed teenager” and not for who I am or what I’ve been through. I can’t call a friend because I’ll end up scaring them. I just feel like there’s no one to help me fight this battle. The friends who I used to go to ignore me now because of my “moods.” It sucks that people don’t understand that depression isn’t a switch that can be turned off. I have to say though, it does help me to know that there are other people out there that feel like I do. I’m grateful that there are other people who know how I feel.

  89. Thank you so much!! This may help me =)

  90. I’ve had depression for a few years now. I am in my sophomore year of highschool and upon starting this school year, I was feeling so positive. I was in the marching band, the drama department, and I was in an AP class along with another honors class. I know I have it good at the moment. I was so hopeful this year that I could forget everything that has happened to me and my family over the last six years. I won’t go into the details. All I know is that I’ve been feeling so strange lately. Normally, I get a huge mental breakdown every two months or so and then I’m pretty much okay. I still have off days, but otherwise, I don’t have suicidal thoughts or intentions. But this last month, all of the bad feelings and thoughts have come back. They’re not full force, but they’re always there at the back of my mind. I’ve been having urges to cut myself again after being clean for nearly a year. Just a night or so ago, I thought about popping pills and ending it, but deep down, I don’t think I truly want to die. It’s like there’s this other half of me that takes over sometimes, and when it’s present, I feel like I’ll go insane. At this point, I’m just scared. My mom knows that I’ve self harmed, because we dealt with the same thing with my older sister. After I first cut, I went straight to my mom, and I’m so glad that I did. But now, after being clean, I’m scared that if I relapse, I’ll hurt her. It hurt me so much to watch my sister as more and more scars and burns appeared on her arms, and I know that it must have put my mother through hell to watch her child deteriorate from self harm and drug and alcohol abuse. My sister is sober now, and, unlike in our childhood, we now have a great relationship. I love her so much and I don’t want to let her down by self harming. It’s just so hard to resist the urges sometimes. I need control and I need to get rid of my anxiety. I’m literally shaking as I type this. All I know is that I’ve been feeling out of it for the last month and that needs to change so I can forget everything that’s happened. Most of the family drama has passed at this point and I think I’m scared that something terrible is going to happen again. I’m also scared of getting nightmares again. I used to get them daily as a result of witnessing a traumatic event involving my brothers, and those nightmares made me want to kill myself so I could avoid them. I was scared to sleep and it was a struggle to persuade myself to go to bed each night. I can’t go back to that. I don’t think I could take another horrible event without losing my mind. I just want to feel like my normal self again.

  91. I am sixteen years old and I started cutting before my junior year of high school. I have not been doing it for long but I already have a lot of scars. I truly started self harming about two years ago. I would bite myself. I would bite so hard I would leave marks for hours. But I got my braces off and biting stopped hurting. I was driving home and I broke a spoon and just dug it into my skin the first time I cut. The last time up to this point was yesterday. I have been having really bad panic attacks and last night I was shaking for an hour before I cut. It just calms me down and helps me breathe. It is a horrible coping strategy I have developed and I really want to stop. My parents know. My mom saw it because I took my bracelets off one day and she saw them. I lied to her at first but eventually I gave in. When she found out, she told me I was just doing it to seek attention She doesn’t know that I still do it. But I really want to stop. I was talking to a guy I have known since I was six months old. He moved to Texas and we only talk over text and snap chat. I was just sending him a picture of the floor but he saw the blood dripping on my arm. He figured it out pretty quickly and told me “I need to stop.” I know I do and I am trying. I hadn’t cut in a month and a half before this incident. Today I told him I need help to stop. He is going to help me. What really got through to me was him saying “I will be better when you stop.” I keep feeling like no one cares about me and that my “friends” aren’t really my friends. Even though we haven’t seen each other in three years, he still cares. I am going to stop but I don’t know how. I want to stop, I just don’t quite know how.

    • Thank you for reaching out for help. We are here to help you break the bonds of self-harm. We have trained HopeCoaches that will listen and connect you with a resource to overcome your desire to cut. Go to http://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp to chat with a HopeCoach anytime.

  92. I started cutting when I was nine. I had stopped for a month. But just recently I had the worst panic attack at school. I had nothing to cut myself with. I broke a glass bottle and cut myself with the edges. I don’t even know what to do anymore. My arm is covered with scars, and so are my thighs. I always wear jackets and long sleeves but I just can’t do it anymore.

  93. Hi. My friend is only 12 and she has the urge to cut herself and I don’t know what to do to help her.
    On the other hand I always feel the need to cut myself but I never have (I’m 13 btw). The most prominent though is suicide and I have attempted it four times. I fake my smile every day and lie almost the whole day about how I feel. I had anxiety which I went to go see a theripist and they though I was cured but it hasn’t gone away. My whole family is christian and they think I’m fine and I have no problems, I was and sort am christian but god hasn’t talked or done anything for the past year and I can’t even feel any hope.. It feels like there’s nothing left to live for apart from my parents and my friend.

    • You sound like a really good friend. You can chat with a HopeCoach about how to help your friend and also about your anxiety and depression. We care about you and we are here to help you. Just click on the “Chat Now” – https://www.thehopeline.com/GetHelp/

    • Wow. I am so sorry but I want you to know there is always something to live for. I am also sort of a Christian and I have had the same struggles as you with God feeling like he is really there for me. I am sixteen and I cut. I have been trying to quit and I have for periods of times but I always go backwards. I have contemplated suicide but I am trying to convince myself that we are all here for some reason. I think we are and I am trying to get back to my faith. Sometimes it helps to talk to Him because it feels like someone is there. I really hope you find your reason to live for yourself. I am here to if you want to talk. Thanks for sharing your story.

  94. I am 14, i cut my thighs and just started to cut my wrists I don’t know what to do anymore I’ve been trying to stop but everything i do don’t work. I’ve only been doing it for a short while but somehow it seems to help me feel. I just don’t want to hurt my loved ones anymore i just want to get better. Can anyone HELP?

    • Thanks for opening up here and for reaching out for help. You can chat with one of our HopeCoaches anytime 24/7 https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp/ We are here to help you.

  95. i miss cutting. i dont have much to say. just its been about 2 months and i miss it. im sorry

    • thats fine, really.i was clean for a year, i missed it but being clean is a huge step from beaing stray from the addiction of self harm. 2 months is a lot. Good Job!

  96. I Have A Friend Who Cuts And I’m Trying To Help Her Quit. Any ADvice?

  97. I feel like know one cares about me anymore that I’m not needed. I’m the middle child I have a smart sister and a little brother whose 10 months younger than me . So why do they need me they already ignore me. The only thing that likes me in this house is my dog. My parents are always fighting and I use cutting as an excuse to get away from problems. I have depression and sucidal thoughts. It’s just m done. Can’t take the pain anymore. I’ve been bullied and called names and how can I be Ok if no one . I’m going down the wrong path and theres no one to stop me anymore from doing the wrong thing my name is Emily and I’m fourteen

    • I understand how you feel. I too feel like no one cares about me and I have been using cutting to escape my problems. But sometimes people can surprise you. I had a friend who I haven’t seen in six years because he moved to Texas but he saw my arm and he cares. I was shocked. There is someone that always cares and I care. I am here if you want to talk. Please know that people care and that eventually things have to get better.

  98. Recently, i found out i might be bipolar.. i instantly fell into depression, i cut almost everyday and my friends know that they cant help me through it.. i’m too far gone to realize how twisted my self harm is, i wear sweaters all the time just to hide my scars. i was clean for a whole year but then this just hit me. it hit me just like my parents used to hit me, it hurt and burned like my scars, i was so used to being abused and bruised that i cut just to feel like i have purpose, but this website really helped, i know people who go through self harm, i sent the link to the website to my friend, and i told her we can get through this together… and i know i’m probably too far gone to help, but these are some really helpful things that could have saved me from my self harm. And i don’t really know if i can recover, but i just might. if i do reover, i will be sure to come back and tell you how i’m doing -Sincerely, Ryan

  99. People care, you should know that. i feel how you feel. but people care, if you suggest ways they can help you, they just might get you through all this, and if you do, you could finally learn to have a smile that is’nt fake. -Ryan

  100. I’m 13 and I just started to cut and its scary and everyone around me is trying to help but it makes things harder for me when they are all saying that i just need to not do it because I know that they don’t understand how hard it is to stop. Does anyone have advice on how to best explain it to them?

  101. I have depression, and i self hamr. I went a month with out cutting and now im cutting again… 🙁

  102. Hi, I’m 14 almost 15. I just started cutting last summer but it has gotten worse and I can’t seem to stop, I need mess but I’m scared to talk to my mom about it please help what should I do?

    • I am so glad you posted here and are reaching out for help. My daughter struggled with this, too, at about your age and I was so thankful she opened up to me about it. We were able to talk about other things she was struggling with, too. I imagine your mom would want to know so she can help you. The two of you could read through TheHopeLine® eBook together about self-harm and that could help you talk about it together. Also, you can chat with a HopeCoach anytime 24/7 by clicking the “chat now” button. It is confidential and it is free. Some of our HopeCoaches have even had similar struggles, so they really understand. You are not alone.

  103. I’m gonna be 24 this year, and recently I got this strong urge to cut myself. The reason is because I want to, it’s like an escape, a way to hide what I’m feeling emotionally and to punish myself. Suicidal thoughts and running away is another option of mine. Honestly what I feel is that i crave for the love of a family too much. I tried too much. So whenever I have an argument with my siblings or parents or whenever I made a mistake and my family members including my parent’s will treat me coldly hurts me. The thought that my dad will have a bad impression of me is what I worried most. I don’t want him to see me as a bad daughter, a useless one, a burden. I came from a big family, I’m the youngest. The age gap is big, I’m not close to either one of them. It feels like whenever I made a mistake, it’s always a big issue. I was told I can’t do things properly and always doing it halfway even when I honestly forgot about it. Then when one of my siblings made the same mistake, they aren’t told off by my parents or anything. I think it’s unfair. I tried my best to do what I can at home, most of the chores I’m the one who do it but yet complains never stop. I feel unappreciated. When I see my parents treat my siblings better than me, instead of feeling jealous, I wonder why do they treat their children like that when they too go through unfairness in their family before. After reading through some articles,I guess I’m lucky that I haven’t start cutting myself as it might be an addiction later on. But the urge is there, I’m finding it hard to get rid of it. There was once where I argued with my mum. And the fact that my mum just listen to one side of the story and never listen to mine and scolded me drives me crazy. I started crying out loud and I took my laptop battery and hit my head for quite sometime till one of my siblings ask me to stop. I guess I’m too sensitive. Its exhausting and a burden. Life is already tiring itself. I find myseld question what is life. I hope this doesn’t come out as self pity. I don’t want people to pity me. I’m sharing this because I feel I need help. I need help to gt rid of this feeling before I really start doing it.

    • I am so glad you are here reaching out for help. That’s a lot you are going through in your family. Family relationships can be hurtful at times, but thankfully you don’t have to be stuck there. We are here to chat with you, to help you work through these relationships, and to help you find a way out. We will listen and we have resources to help. We are here 24/7 – simply click the “chat now” button.

      • What should I do. The urge is still there. Kept imagining that I cut myself and maybe I would die. Imagining my dead body lying on the bed. The shock or nonchalant reaction from my family members. I’m thinking is for the best, less burden in the family. The only one not earning at home. Nobody would be complaining about me to my dad. Less stress for him. Im a coward isn’t it? Trying to run away from problems through the idea of suicide and running away from home and cutting myself just to feel better. How should I face these cold treatments whenever I made a mistake at home. Im afraid of feeling hurt from the words that come out of their mouth. Im trying to avoid it. There’s this feeling in my chest where I’m burying it deep down. I dnt wanna find out

        • Did you try chatting with one of our HopeCoaches? It is free and confidential and we are here 24/7. Go to this link https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp or click the “chat now” button. We really do care about you.

  104. please help, im 15 and i have started cutting since i was 12. i hate disappointing people, and people keep making me snap, i need help, it’s like a black hole that wants to eat me up and i feel like i’m going to explode, i cant talk to anyone cause no one understands people who knows just tell me to stop they dont say anything right. and its sad that even the people i live with never notices any of the cuts, and when they do they just say dumb things that makes me angry and i snap so easily please just help, i want to stop it.

  105. I’m 13… I’ve been cutting for over a year but I haven’t been able to find one solution. All this stress and I can’t bring a razor to my skin anymore makes it even worse. Idk what to do and none of these work for me I’ve tried a lot of them. Guess I’m not only a dissapontment to My family but to myself as well

    • You are not a disappointment to us here at TheHopeLine. We understand struggles, hurt, and disappointments. We are here to listen and to give good advice about how you can move forward. There really is hope! Please chat with a HopeCoach. Just click the “chat now” button or go to this link https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp

  106. Im 14.. I cut every day.. my parents know, They dont care. Im not no pills and im having suicidal thoughts and i attemped suicide last night.. I have no friends to talk to. i cant seek consoling and that costs money. I am in a pit of depression and loneliness.. What do i do.. There is no hope for me..

    • That makes me really sad that your parents know about it and deon’t care. Here at TheHopeLine we do care! Please chat with a HopeCoach about how you are feeling. Just click the “chat now” button or go to this link https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp We are here for you 24/7. You are not alone.

      • I try to talk to hope coaches and they just direct me to the suicide lifeline thing. The lines are long and they always give me the same stuff. “we care about you robby, You are not alone..” IF I WASNT ALONE WOULD I BE ASKING FOR HELP OVER THE INTERNET????????????????????????????

        • Robby, I am really sorry that you felt that talking to the HopeCoach didn’t help. I saw that you chatted in about a month ago and it sounds like you are still struggling. I am sorry the HopeCoach did not get a chance to connect you with our partner, Door of Hope. This is their website – http://www.doorofhope4teens.org/home.html
          They have a cutting crisis line and specific help for teens struggling with self-harm. If you need help connecting with them please let me know. I think it has the potential to be a good support system for you.

          • I keep cutting and atempting suicide, No one would care if i killed myself! I have no friends and my family hates me
            Im hurting myself everyday

          • That’s not true. I don’t know that much about you but I care. I hope you know others do to and you should not kill yourself. I have certainly thought about it myself but we have to keep trying and be open to someone caring for us. Because you never know when someone will come along to help you and really care for you. I care too.

          • Robby… I know how you’re feeling. I have no idea how it feels to be that far deep, but I understand the feeling. And I know that no amount of ‘you’re not alone’ or ‘just believe me, people care about you’ will help. I’ve been there. My best friend has a problem with cutting as well. She sent me a message once saying that she counted 60 cuts. And I’ve been going through a huge stage of depression for a long time now myself. Every day, I just feel so left out, and all the friends I used to have abandoned me. But… despite all of this, we have stuff to accomplish on this Earth! Things that WILL – one day – make us cared for. And we just have to keep looking at what we COULD do. And this may or may not click at some point for you, but you just need to power through it. Know that change will come eventually, and for now, just ignore everything except what you need to do to ACHIEVE those things that you want to do.

          • I have attempted suicide as well and I did it because I felt like nobody cared about me or my feelings. I was cutting, and eventually brought a gun to my head. My only friend told me to think about all the people who do care about you, even if you don’t know them and they don’t know you.

          • I’m 24. And I still cut myself. I don’t like to talk to people really. But do you want to talk to me ?

    • I just happened to see this, and I’ve been struggling a lot recently too. I just want you to know that you really aren’t alone, even when it feels like it, and if you ever want to talk we can. As far as what you can do, maybe find a distraction, something to do when you feel like that. For me drawing or writing helps. Also, there are apps like whisper, that you can post anonymously and talk to people. It’s really helped me through a lot of hard times.

      • but i have nothing.. No friends. No one who doesnt hate me

        • i will be your friend. i’m 14 and struggling with cutting too. you are loved by way more people than you can imagine. i got called out to the counselor because someone from a distance cares enough and must’ve seen my wrists to report me. if people saw what was happening to you, they’d do the same. you are loved and you’re probably a caring soul. talk to me if you need to. i’ll be here and i’ll help you out if you need

        • They don’t hate you. I know that. I feel that now. But don’t give up on other people for help.
          I understand.
          Loneliness hurts.
          I don’t have any real friends. Nobody I can seriously talk with. So hello strangers. This is the first anyone’s heard.
          help me
          I’m sorry. But I need to tell someone. I need to do something to release that feeling that makes me cut. Anything. I can’t do things from the list because urges come when I’m supposed to be sleeping. If anyone finds out… I don’t know. It’s probably good I can only get plastic knives. But they can make scars. I do it in visible places because I don’t even know. I’m sorry for making this long. Even now I’m feeling out about sending this because it’s horribly written and no one wants to hear. sorry

    • Hi sweetie… I’m a recovering cutter as well. I know it’s four months after you posted that, but I hope you’re doing better. Just know that while there might not be anyone for you now, there will be soon, or you possibly have people now. There’s so many people who understand what you’re going through.

    • Man I understand you. I attempted suicide last year after a sexual assault from my sister. I felt like no one cared about me, I felt dirty and like living was pointless. Then I got help. I went to my school councilor and told them what was going on. I then went to the doctor and got meds they don’t always help but they are worth having. Sometimes depression isn’t caused by anything. Sometimes there is just a chemical imbalance in your brain. It causes you to believe lies about yourself.
      Just know you are not alone and I love you. Maybe we can text sometime. I know it would help me to have someone to talk to about this stuff.

    • I know how you feel I’mma 15 and I cut everyday almost and I want to die to

      • Victoria, If you are in crisis and need someone to talk to right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1.800.273.8255 or chat online with them at http://chat.suicidepreventi… Also, you can contact our partners at Door of Hope for help with cutting at http://www.doorofhope4teens.org. They will help any age to overcome self-harm. Check out their website or email them at doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs) You can also text them at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST

  107. I attempted suicide.. No one cares. Im alone in a pit of loneliness and pain..

    • i feel ya. i care, man.

      • Why..

        • because you can do better my bro
          I made this account just to tell u that

    • Don’t you get it?! That’s how you get out?! The pit of loneliness and pain, there’s a lot of people in that pit so FIND ONE OF THEM and work together to be happier!!!! As someone with multiple suicide attempts of which nobody cared, and as someone who didn’t start having friends until a few months ago, BROKEN PEOPLE MAKE GOOD FRIENDS SO FIND SOME MESSED UP PEOPLE TO BE HAPPY WITH!!!!

  108. i am 13 years old and i started cutting today. i am alonein this world. my parents and i mutually hate each other, i have no friends, and i am a bad person. i know i deserve to die, but still i have not committed suicide because i hope that anyone, anyone, will save me. it hurts too much tho and i am seriously depressed. please. save me.

    • There is so much in life that is waiting for you. You are the artist and life is the canvas. It’s scary, I know. The mean kids, the dysfunctional family. Abuse. Mistakes. Hatred and anxiety. But…Here’s a secret. Your life is special. There is purpose you need to find, hobbies that make you happy that you need to pursue. A secret calling that only you can find. Everything seems overwhelming and unmanageable. It just takes practice to manage your time and to only focus on things that make you happy in life. No matter how bad things seem. One day you will own a car, maybe a house or you might live on a beach. You get there one step at a time. You are where you need to be to achieve that success one day. What you are going through will make you wildly strong and successful when you grow up. One thing that helps me is music. I constantly listen to it and derive motivation and the power to keep moving forward from it. as Ariel says : “My self hatred never took me where I wanted to go.” “You can pick up the pain but can’t cut it away.” You deserve every thing you want in life but you must fight for it. NO ONE can tell you what you are worth. There is someone who you have not met yet who needs you. Life and fight and find happiness for yourself, your future and for them. Thank you for posting about your feelings and keep doing so. You helped me. Life gets so much better and when you are older you get all the power over your life. And every mistake you .Already right now? No one will remember it eventually. I promise you. Most stuff people for get over a summer break. No matter what happens, know you are meant to live and to be happy. It will come over time and you are not living life wrong. People will always try to tear you down but you will meet people who treasure and value you. I’m closer with my friends than anyone in my family. Things are not like they are on TV, but they can be better if you work at it. I hope this helped. Sorry for the rambling!

  109. I’m 14 and I did cut for 2 years and ive been cut free for 4 mouths and I have never told anyone about it and ive been really wanting to do it lately I know I need help I really want to tell my mom but I’m just to scared shes already really stressed and I don’t want her worrying about me but I fell like if I don’t tell anyone its going to get worse and I’m going to end up cutting

  110. Joshua Gatti
    What you said really did kinda have an impact on me. I always wear a sweat shirt, long sleeve shirt or multiple hair ties on my wrist to cover my cuts up. I started cutting when i was 11 and I’m now 14. I still get the urge to cut sometimes but always find a way to stop myself.

  111. I haven’t cut myself in almost a year and half I think, it feels longer then that. But today I really feel dead inside… i just don’t want to go back down that road again. I’m just hoping someone can just listen

  112. I’m 14 and have been cutting on and off for several months now. It’s been getting so bad that I cut almost everyday to the point where I have cuts up and down my arms. My parents keep noticing them and I always bullshit come excuse. I want to tell my therapist but she would have to tell my parents and I don’t know what to do.

  113. Im 13, and I know this is extremely dumb but I have a girlfriend, and I want to say I love her but I’m in middle school so most likely I don’t even know what love is. Anyway, we’ve had issues lately so we decided to take a break from each other for a couple weeks. At first I thought this was a great idea because we could both turn back into the people we wanted to date because both of us had changed a lot since we started dating. Literally 3 days into this break, she starts flirting with some other guy who used to be my best friend. The next day he keeps saying he’s “Mr. Steel-Your-Girl”. I asked her about it and I said “Look, if you’re going to leave me for him then just break up with me and stop messing with my emotions”, and she responded with “I love you, and we’re just friends, he’s nothing to worry about”. I thought that it wasn’t anything to worry about but then I see her playing with his hair and now she acts like I don’t even exist. I tried to talk to her a couple minutes ago just to tell her that I loved her but all she said was “Ok, I have to go”. I used to cut and I’ve attempted suicide in the past. This has brought all those feelings back. I’ve started cutting again, and I’ve been weighing out the pros and cons of killing myself for about an hour now. I really need help and advice both on cutting and on what to do with my relationship. I will be extremely grateful if you just read this.

    • Please chat with one of our HopeCoaches. I don’t want you to feel alone in this. She really hurt you and it helps to have someone to talk to about what happened and how you are feeling. Cutting is a temporary solution. Talking to someone who cares will really help. We are available 24/7 through our APP or this link – https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp

  114. She’s broken up with me because of lies. I can’t take this anymore. I want to die.

    • Please know that you still have a lot of your life left to live. I know it seems hard right now but I promise you will get through it. I hope you know there will always be people who care about you. And nothing you care deeply about is ever going to be dumb. I just want you to know I read your story and I am here for you if you ever need someone.

  115. Im atempting suicide

    • I am sorry I am only just now seeing your post. I hope that you did not go through with anything. When you have those feelings you can chat with a HopeCoach immediately and it is free. Here is the link to get help – https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp

  116. I am 15 years.I hate my body cause I feel like I am fat.I cut and I want to stop but my wrist are screaming at my to cut them

    • It really helps to talk to someone trustworthy about how you are feeling. Our HopeCoaches are online 24/7 to chat and it is totally free and confidential. We also have some really great resources who care about teens who struggle with body image and cutting. There is hope for you. Here is the link to chat https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp

  117. I’m 39, and breaking. Been looking at my skin for near an hour and want to cut it. Never had the urge as badly as I do now. I just want a distraction from my mind, and a physical pain, it may be easier than the silent inside pain from my mind

  118. Im 13 years old struggling with depression and anxiety caused by being a vegetarian but were still not sure, and I do self harm it started with scratching,biting,hitting,pinching then it led to razors I try to stop but its like I stop for a few months and then the urge comes back and I cut. I fight through it everyday and Im gonna keep fighting there are times were I gave up there was even a time were I planned my own suicide and prepared a video for my loved ones and my mom found me crying in bed with all my room messed up because I had a break down and thats when it started becoming serious to my family. I was gonna go to a phycologist and I was even evaluated then my mom researched about how vegetarians become depressed and get anxiety from the lack of meat and chicken.
    But I feel like theres more to it not just being a vegetarian but I don’t know I’m waiting 3 months to see if theres a difference in my mood. I see one every time I eat meat then it wares off and Im back to being the same numb person. I was someone who is really popular and has so many friends but I started distancing myself because I couldn’t act like everything was okay and I need a break from everything and everyone. I hate everything about myself my anger is scary Im scared to rage in front friends which happened a few times and it wasn’t pretty. Only 2 people know why I am like that and I found it better blaming my rages and my mood swings how being vegetarian causes depression and anxiety because theres now a reason why Im like this. I hate when people think Im weak, my sister and my mom scream at me sometimes because they think Im weak for hurting myself because sometimes it get bad. But now Im just numb no feelings Im ignoring the fact that Im sad and I distract myself with tv shows I get lost in them for hours and the only time Im not is if Im out with my friends and family. No one should feel alone it is our choice to feel alone or not push yourself to the people who love you and they will guide you to the right path. Your happiness lies in your hands…

    • I am so sorry you are struggling with depression, anxiety, and cutting. And it sounds like it is about more than just being a vegetarian. The anger is definitely part of the symptoms of real depression. You can chat with a HopeCoach about how you are feeling and get some resources that will help – https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp The chat is free and it is open 24/7. We are here for you. Also, we have a great partner called Door of Hope that especially helps anyone struggling with cutting – https://www.thehopeline.com/5-things-to-know-about-door-of-hope-help-for-self-harm

  119. I am so sorry you are struggling with this and that you are suffering all alone. I am really thankful you came in here and posted. It will really help if you talk to your parents and let them know how you are feeling. We have a free eBook you can download and you and your parents could read it together – http://info.thehopeline.com/selfharm We also have a great partner called “Door of Hope” – https://www.thehopeline.com/5-things-to-know-about-door-of-hope-help-for-self-harm AND you can chat with one of our HopeCoaches here at TheHopeLine anytime 24/7. It is free and totally confidential – https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp We care about you, Jazz!

  120. I’m almost 32. I haven’t cut since I was 29. I really felt the urge today but reading this helped. I’ve already done journaling and I’m about to listen to music. I have decided I will not cut. I can’t indulge in that behavior. I cut myself for 17 years. I can’t go back to that after all this time.

    • I am really proud of you! Way to go on choosing healthy tools like journaling and music. You are an encouragement and an inspiration for anyone struggling. Thank you for sharing here. You can also send your story to us and we will post it on on stories page – https://www.thehopeline.com/storiespage Again, thanks for sharing!

  121. I’m 15 an I badly want to cut/slice ny skin up; my head, my legs, my chest, my arms. Im losing my mind resisting this urges. When I try to seek help they only tell me that im being dramatic. Im starting to lose myself

    • Please chat with a HopeCoach as soon as possible. We can help you get through this and we have some really great support resources. SO proud of you for trying to resist the urge and for seeking help. We are here for you and we really understand how tough it is – https://www.thehopeline.com/gethelp
      All chats are free and totally confidential. Chat is open 24/7.

  122. I am Robby white. Im 15 years old I am done with life. I have PTSD, Anorexia, and major Depression. My Girlfriend just broke up with me. I wanna take every single blade to myself and i wanna kill myself. I hate myself so much and i need to die.. no one cares about me, i have zero friends, i have no one in my life now, My whole family hates me.. i need to die.

    • There is hope for you Robby. It can feel like all darkness in that place in life but the way you feel in this moment is not necessarily the reality of what actually is. Please take the time to chat with us more about this. We would love the chance to walk with you through some strategies and ways to help. Chat at: http://www.TheHopeLine.com/gethelp.

    • You are very valuable Robby. Please don’t commit suicide. I know I don’t know you but it breaks my heart to see other people hurting. You are not alone, I cut too and I am praying for you. No season can last forever, I promise. I love you and I know that you have a great future ahead of you. Please don’t give up, Jesus is there for you and even when it feels like no one else is, he is. I don’t know if you are a believer or not, but I encourage you to have hope, it’s going to be okay!

    • hey, you still there? id love to talk

    • I have been cutting since I was in the 4th grade, I dont want to do it anymore, but seek help. As a matter of fact though you dont think you have friends you do. I dont personaly know you but you have friends, and even if you dont feel like you do, talk to a trusted adult. I have been so close to commiting suicide 2 times and I have two friends that knows what I am going through and both of them pick up the phone no matter what. If it is to ask a question for school or if it is to talk about my feelings and them trying to help me stop thinking about cutting. You matter. Wheather you think so or not, there are people that love you, and care for you, and think that you matter. SO there is always another way for different people. My way is talking to people that I trust, and i still cut… but that means that my way isnt working…Find a way.. There is hope….always hope….for everyone that feels like this

      • Thank you for reaching out. We are here to listen and help. We have a partner that will help you with the need to self-harm.
        • You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST.
        • Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
        • You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)
        If you ever feel so overwhelmed you can’t go on, please call:
        • The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1.800.273.8255
        • Or Chat with them at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat/
        • Or Crisis Text Line 27/7 by texting “Start” to 741-741
        • Here is a list of additional suicide prevention resources https://www.thehopeline.com/suicide-prevention-resources.
        Take a chance and reach out to Door of Hope for help. You will be glad you did. They have helped many teens and young adults we have sent them overcome self-harm.
        Stay Strong…We Believe in You!

    • Find one person. One person is all you need. One person who cares. If anything happened to her I would kill myself, but if I never met her, I’d already be dead. Find your her.

    • Robby White, please ik it must absolutely suck to feel this down about yourself and your ex clearly doesn’t understand how horrible it feels. Ik from personal experience that self hamrning is never the answer or suicide yu have so much waiting for you so please please don’t go. The world needs people like you who have their own personal problems and are willing to open up and share but what are yu going to do when people see and ask and question, my school found out because a girl told them and I love this girl she is my bestfriend and without her I wouldn’t be here today livin, breathing, loving, if yu ever have the urge to self harm hold and ice cube and count to 20 it helps trust me x

  123. I have been using a rubber band it helps a little but some how I managed to almost open a year 6 month old scare

  124. I have never been here before, but trying to put words to feelings I typed- “I’m trying not to cut myself” and I came across this website. Obviously I know this impulse is wrong, I don’t want to hurt myself, but sometimes it can be hard. Pain is easy sometimes and I often know I deserve it. It’s been awhile without cutting, and I was never obsessive about it compared to some. Sometimes It’s only because I didn’t want toexplain it. Because it’s hard to say how I feel an overwhelming stress and hurt that I just want to own it and make it go away long enough to stop it that I’m sitting alone in my garage with a razor blade in front of me trying not to do it. My wife is In bed. I’m tired, distracted with this urge to hit something and scream-but some part says that’s selfish and I have no reason to assume I deserve that outright attention.
    Maybe it’s pride, or a lack of it, but I know I can take pain and in some ways that I deserve it without sympathy. But in these moments I’m the most vulnerable and weak that I can be, and I hate myself for it.
    I don’t like myself Most of the time, but since I was younger I’ve tried to change that and be someone’s I would like in some small way. I’m really down right now and in these moments I seem to have no one. I’ve made the mistake of succumbing to this before- I’ve fallen back into cutting when at my lowest…. And by no means dangerously or obsessively…. Just an outlet for manifesting the pain I can’t express of feel enough to expunge. But when I saw my wife with cuts after we had a fight, and realized how it was my fault- how she had seen that I had expressed the hurt with self cutting, AND I thought so absurdly that she didn’t know to hide it, hadn’t had to explain it, or didn’t care to- I realized those cuts were mine. It was my fault and struggle with that. So I sit here in my garage with a razor blade crying and trying to process how I’m feeling and why this isn’t the way to make it better. It’s been an hour. I’m tired. I just hate being in this place, especially because I know I am objectively fortunate. I’m unemployed- laid off and upset about that, but not unfortunate. I just seem to feel that I deserve the hurt, and the relief might come. But I don’t want my wife to see, I dont want to be my worst and most vulnerable self. And I don’t want to suicide…( Ha) if only because I don’t think I matter enough to warrant hurting others, or that it would make anything better. I want to be the person I so try to be, but these fragil selfish times bring me back to my weakest self. It’s a battle with myself to be stronger than this, and what can be scary is that I know much of that supposed strength has been wrapped around my love for my wife and family… And that’s why I’m trying not not cut myself. That’s why I’m sitting alone grappling with that urge. It’s the frustration of that same love for family that brings me low now, and it’s what also makes me want to rise above this. I want to say that if I can hurt myself that I can do something for someone else
    Is it moments of overwhelming loneliness that triggers this? Cause I’m not particularly sad or hard off, and In Some way it’s an urge to vent because I know I can take my own selfInflicted Pain better than any other external type. It’s just tough to feel as though I can’t make the stress go away and seems so easy to do harm on myself as I so naturally want the physical and mental to align and be done with.
    But I haven’t cut myself and the razor didn’t vent my feelings like when I was younger. I’d have to say it’s because of my wife that I didn’t, but it’s the husband I need to be that is battling against the urge to hate myself.
    I came here because I didnt want to cut myself. I can’t say roping my self worth around my wife or anyone else doing so for any romantic relationship is without potential issues- but she is a reason for me to be better, and finding those things to love more than myself right now is helping me be less selfish.
    I hope someone else might come here, read others posts, and find a reason to not cut yourself too.

  125. I’m 14 and i have been clean for nearly 3 months i have something to tell you don’t cut because it consumes you and takes you away from people that care about you because I used to be a ghost with a beating heart so don’t lie to your family be truthful thats what they are there for

  126. sometimes i dont know why i insulted myself harder than other people that make me want to take my own life but considering that i have a lot of thing mybe i save it later so i used that opportunity to cut myself a lot!because i feel so insecure with humans around me so i coped to myself only .yeah all people will eventually die in a time!and i feel that if i ended my own life i would more lamely because i have nothing to prove when iam alive ,everytime when iam in stable condition,i always try the best to make positive thing while iam still alive so that little by lttle it would change something! eventhough it just stand for a minute i think it’s fine?!

  127. I’m 28 and I have been cutting for 14 years tomorrow I meet with a self harm therapist but I cut to relieve emotional pain and because I feel like I’m not good enough

  128. I have been cutting for about 8 months need and it’s started to get really bad. I do it and once I start it’s like I can’t stop making cuts until I exhaust myself (I tend to cut at night because I can fight off the urge in the daytime by surrounding myself with people) I told 2 people last month and both told me I could go to them if I wanted help but they’ve put me off the last five times I’ve hit a weak point and reached out. I’m starting to give up, I don’t want a life where my only purpose is to hurt myself. I’m debating on whether to take my life or not.

  129. I’m only 12 and will become 13 in a week. I’ve had the erge to cut recently. I keep thinking about doing it every night but I’m too scared. My parents divorced when I wasn’t even 2, my step mom is a ____, and so is my step sister. My life s just bad. The erge wont go away until I try it, it’s happened before. I just need help or just someone to talk to. None of my friends will listen or they will just think I’m depressed. I don’t know what to do…

    • Kathryn, We are sorry you are going through this and are glad you’re reaching out for help about your urge to cut. We have a great partner that will help you through this time in your life. They are called:
      Door of Hope4 Teens.
      Website: http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
      Email: doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)
      Texting: 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904)
      OPEN: Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST

  130. I’m 13, my parents are “married” and living in the same house but they hate each other. My mom’s having an affair with some guy she claims to work with, she didn’t even tell me I just accidentally found out. I’ve cut myself before that my parents didn’t know about, but I usually punch myself or hit myself. Cutting just seems to obvious. I’m homeschooled and take taekwondo but it doesn’t seem to help. My mom screams and calls me swears constantly, my dad barely talks to me. My friends pretend to care but never ask how I am or if I wanna talk they just care about “more important things”
    I wanna kill myself

    • Ari, We hear your pain and the struggle you are going through with your parents. It’s good that you have reached out to tell your story and to get help. We have a partner that can help you with the cutting. They are Door of Hope4 Teens and their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org . You can email them at doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs) for help or you can text them at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST. Please reach out to them and let us know how you are doing.

  131. i am 13 i have been cutting ever since 6th grade it was over a boy i had like 3 months clean but the feeling of cutting came back i grabbed a razor head looked up on youtube on how to get it, it worked so like i have 7 times trying to kill myself i am seeing medical help but nothing has helped none of my friends dont give a crap so i legit fight alone i need help:(

    • Rosangela, We care about you and want you to find help for the cutting. You don’t have to do this alone. We have a partner that will help you with this at http://www.doorofhope4teens.org. Check out their website or email them at doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs) You can also text them at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST

  132. im 33 and the loss of my best friend in the military is been very hard on me and tried to reach
    out to my friends but been very very hard i dont know how to cope and feels if i cut again it well help relace the pain im in i feel so lost and alone n want my best friend back

  133. Im 16 years old, and I have been dealing with self-harm since i was 11 years old. I’d rather not get into details and sob stories, I just want to learn how to stop without talking to my parents about it, who dont take it seriously anyway. I try writing and distractions but they dont work every time. I use to be 1 year clean but as life is unfair, suicidal thoughts and old tendencies creep back on me and it is the worst feeling in the world to go back to bad habits. i know its not good for me, and it hurts so much while its happening, but its my first thought when the slightest inconvenience happens, and if i dont cut then i feel so agitated and sad, and people notice. i wish i never discovered this disturbing addiction, i wish none of us did.

    • Moe, We have a partner that will help you with your self-harm. They are at http://www.doorofhope4teens.org. Check out their website or email them at doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs) You can also text them at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904)

  134. I’mma 15 and I don’t know what do I’mma keep on cutting and I can’t stop I’mma only 15 and I’mma in middle school I have been having sucide thoughts and I have been wanting to die

  135. Im 15 and i cut. Ive been doing it since 5 grade. My mental health issues have been with me since 3rd grade when my first suicide attempt occured. Its has been hard to get over this but i am slowly healing. I really hope i wont ever cut again. So ll do as told to get better.

    • That is great that you are overcoming your desire to cut. If you ever feel like you need some support and help with sellf-harm we have a partner that will help you with this at http://www.doorofhope4teens.org. Check out their website or email them at doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs) You can also text them for help at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST Stay Strong! You can do this!

  136. I hate myself every time i cut but i cant help it. Ive attempted suicide so many times that i lost count. I have ptsd, severe depression, insomnia, and eating dissorders. I literally lost all hope.

    • Aly, We are so sorry you are going through this. We have a partner that will help you with this at http://www.doorofhope4teens.org. They will help any age to overcome self-harm. Check out their website or email them at doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs) You can also text them at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST

  137. I haven’t cut in almost 10 years. The urge lately is overwhelming. Usually I think about it and move on not today I couldn’t move on. Today I had a knife in my hand and almost cut. I threw the knife away and didn’t do it but it really scares me how close I came. I’m hurting so much and I don’t even know why. I feel like I’m losing my mind. Its crazy how badly I want to cut after so long. The urge truley never goes away

  138. I am the mother of a cutter. I don’t know what to do for her. I have her in counseling. We have seen a psychiatrist. I want to teach her how to cope effectively. I want to ask the cutters out there what you wish someone would do for you? What would make you stop. She lost her father at a young age. She is shy. She never talked about it and never grieved. She has a loving family that adores her. She has been in church all her life and knows that God loves her. We all want to help her! How can you prove to a cutter that you love them and teach them to love and respect their body? I spend every moment that I am not working with my child. She is not neglected. She has everything I wish I had as a teen. A car, nice clothes, cool stuff. I support every hobby she comes up with. I can’t give her back the father she lost… How can I show her that I love her? Why is my love not enough to get her through this pain?

    • Jenny, Hopefully, some people that have had struggles with self-harm will answer some of the questions you are asking them. We wanted to let you now about a partner resource we have that may help you with some answers, as well. Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org. You can email doorofhope4teens@gmail.com they will answer within 24/48 hours. They also have a text line that your daughter may like to use for help it is 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST

  139. I started cutting myself when I was 14, then I was hospitalized, and when I got out I started cutting even worse. I would do it at home or at school I would find something, anything to hurt myself with. After a while I started to feel like they were beautiful. People always tell you it gets better and it’s true, but better is subjective. I’m 20 now, and it’s been years since I last cut myself but it’s something that still comes to mind when I’m having a really hard time (which is how I ended up here)

  140. i’m 14 and i’ve been having mental health issues + suicidal ideation since 7th grade, it’s just been getting so bad lately and i started cutting 2 months ago. i try to do it as little as possible because of fear that my classmates will find out but today got so overwhelming, i had a nervous breakdown in swim practice today and all i could think about afterwards was the razor i keep in a little personal box. i have it on my desk right now but i tried this advice using the ice on my wrist and i feel a little better, thank you so much.
    i feel like such a disappointment. i’ve been walking on a fine tightrope for the past months and it feels like everything’s toppling over for some reason. i snapped at my best friend, i can’t focus on assignments anymore, i can no longer do the things i love most. my family gives me support and all but that sometimes makes it even worse because they don’t know how i feel and i’m too scared to muster the courage to tell them about it. i don’t deserve any of the love and affection they give me, they’re only going to end up wishing they never gave it to me in the first place.
    i hate myself and have been consistently for the past weeks. i can’t do anything right and am mediocre at best at the things i can. i know it’s wrong to assume so but i can’t help but think my friends are inwardly repulsed at my entire existence, so much that i’ve made it a habit to obsess over what i could have done wrong that could have jeopardised my friendships with the ones i love.
    i’m not getting help or anything even though i feel like i desperately need it because i’m so, so scared to talk about it with my parents. something tells me they wouldn’t understand or listen to what i say because they’ve got their minds all wrapped up on how i’m doing at school or swim. i tried to tell my mom about how i wanted to stay home from school tomorrow partially due to my nervous breakdown in swim but also i’ve just been feeling really bad in general, and the only thing she could think of as to why was this chemistry quiz i might have failed. i don’t tell her anything anymore, i love her so much but i can’t bring myself to open up to her because i don’t want her to worry any more than she should about me. i want her to stay convinced that i have everything under control even when everything’s falling apart. more importantly i want her to stay proud of me and stay unaware of the true disappointment i am.
    so yeah, i guess those are what drove me to nearly cut, funny how they’re all from my own head. ig i should say thank you to this site for keeping me from actually self-harming, at least for the moment and i hope everyone on here could recover at some point in their lives <3 it's a long and hard journey but i'm pretty sure it's gonna be worth it in the end

    • Angie, You are not alone in what you’re going through. We are proud of you for reaching out and talking about how you’re feeling. We have a partner that will help you with self-harm. Their website is doorofhope4teens.org. Check out their website or email them at doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs) You can also text them at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST They have talked to many teens and young adults facing self -harm and issues like you are facing. Please reach out to them.

  141. I have been cutting since i was in the 4th grade. I have talked to my friends about it and cried multiple times to my friends for help, but the more i go to my friend and the more i cry the more i get the urge to cut. I said go my friend today that I just wanted it all to stop. She is very concerned for me. I have known her since we were in 4th grade and i feel like i can trust her with anything. My parents are now starting to ask me questions on why i always wear sweaters, it id not getting closer to spring, or it already is spring, and i don’t have any more excuses. I don’t want to be around anymore. I have tried committing suicide 2 times and i talk about it on a daily basis but my friends think that i am joking. I don’t know what do anymore. I need help…can someone help me please

    • Giovanna, Thank you for reaching out. We are here to listen and help. We have a partner that will help you with the need to self-harm. You can actually text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST. Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org. You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs) You can also text them at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST. Take a chance and reach out to them for help. You will be glad you did. They have helped many teens and young adults we have sent them overcome self-harm.

  142. i’m 16 and 11 months old. I’ve started to cut and it feels good what do i do to stop. NEED HELP NOW!!!!!!!!

    • Thank you for reaching out. We are here to listen and help. We have a partner that will help you with the need to self-harm.
      • You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST.
      • Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
      • You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)

      • my mom died and i’m being bullied. Every time some one bullies me i feel miserable and when i go home i take a razor and start slicing the back of my hand. How do i stop this?

        • We are sorry to hear that you lost your mom and the bullying you are experiencing. We’re here to listen and help. We have a partner that will help you with the need to self-harm.
          • You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST.
          • Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
          • You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)

          • what if i don’t have a phone? how do i talk to them?

          • Do you have a way to send them an email? They will email you back with help and possibly give you some resources for self-harm in your area. You can mail them at doorofhope4teens@gmail.com and they’ll answer you back between 24 and 48 hours.

        • We are so sorry you are going through this. Losing a parent is devastating and you’re cutting to cope with your loss and withe the bullying. Would you text our partner at 803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST. They can help you through this. Also, we have HopeCoaches available to chat with you in the evening from 7 pm – 12 am Central at thehopeline.com/gethelp

    • Find someone you trust. I know that you don’t want to sit in a therapy room and be forced to tell someone you don’t trust what you feel, so tell a friend. It helps. It really does.

  143. Help! I’m 12 and I cut in pretty sure I have depression!

    • Jaden, It’s important that you get help now for the cutting. . We are here to listen and help. We have a partner that will help you with the need to self-harm.
      • You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST.
      • Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
      • You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)

  144. Im 13 and i cut and i have cut for 8 months and the only one that knows that i have depression in my family is me and my mom does but she does not know about me and it is so hard to not show the scars when they are on my arm and my leg i wish i could stop this horrible thing cause when i look at them i think bad about my self and it’s horrible to think that. I need help but nothing helps or no one helps.:(

    • Hailey, It’s important that you get help for the cutting and depression We are here to listen and help. We have a partner that will help you with the need to self-harm.
      • You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST.
      • Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
      • You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)

  145. I haven’t cut yet but I’m seriously struggling. I think I will later today. I’m trying my hardest not too but I’m losing the fight.

    • Anna, Thank you for reaching out. We are here to listen and help. We have a partner that will help you with the need to self-harm.
      • You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST.
      • Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
      • You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)

    • Don’t cut. The first time is all it takes. Trust me, as a cutter I’ll tell you is not worth it. If you do it once you will most likely do it again. Don’t convince yourself I’m wrong. Don’t convince yourself your above that. Just don’t cut. Find someone who cares. Even if you don’t think they care, tell someone who can always make you smile how you feel. Just please don’t cut. Please don’t become as broken as you think you are. Please don’t be like me.

  146. Hi my name is Kerry I cut sometimes last week there was alot going on I went to my class I had these bad thoughts and I didn’t know what I was thinking or doing because this stress and anxiety from school so I wrote suicide on the table and I was stabbing myself with a pencil and my favorite teacher came in so my teachers took me to the nurse my favorite teacher was really concerned about me she hugged me and told me it was gonna be okay she also said she was really hurt that I did that to myself and then she wanted me to promise her something that I wouldn’t hurt myself anymore she is my favorite kind hearted person she is like a mother to me a mother that I didn’t know I have my current mom doesn’t even pay attention to me but I am glad to have my favorite teacher in my life

    • Hi Kerry, We’re sorry you’re going through this and are glad to hear you have a teacher that really cares about you and what you’re going through. Thank you for reaching out and commenting on this blog. We are here to listen and help. We have a partner that will help you with the need to self-harm.
      • You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST.
      • Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
      • You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)

  147. I cant stop. I still cut after so many years.

  148. I’m 49 yrs old. Sorry, but must give feedback on portion of article about resisting urge to cut…i have resisted cutting just over one month, and the urge is so strong now i feel like pulling my hair out in handfuls because the cutting urge has grown incredibly.

  149. I am trying everyday to fight the urges I even thrown my blades away a week ago but 4 days before I bought new one and start doing it again,talking to anyone about this makes me feel like I’m asking for someone’s sympathy I feel being judge

    • Sofia, The important thing is that you are reaching out for help. We are sorry you feel like you are being judged. Self-harm is a legitimate addiction and can be overcome with the right help and support. We have a partner that will help you with the need to self-harm.
      You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST.
      Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
      You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)
      If you ever feel so overwhelmed you can’t go on, please call:
      The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1.800.273.8255
      Or Chat with them at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat/
      Or Crisis Text Line 27/7 by texting “Start” to 741-741
      Here is a list of additional suicide prevention resources https://www.thehopeline.com/suicide-prevention-resources.
      Take a chance and reach out to Door of Hope for help. You will be glad you did. They have helped many that we have sent to them overcome the desire to cut and self-harm.

  150. im am ** yrs old and have been resisting cutting for 3 months, a girl has been worried about me and made me stop

    • Zane, Thank you for reaching out. We are here to listen and help. It’s important that you find out now what is prompting you to want to cut yourself, before it becomes and addiction. We have a partner that will help you with this urge to self-harm.
      You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST.
      Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
      You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)
      Take a chance and reach out to Door of Hope for help. You will be glad you did. They have helped many teens and young adults we have sent them overcome self-harm.

  151. I once stopped cutting for a year or so but then things got complicated. Ive been doing it again. Ive been resisting the urge for 2 weeks and i just want to cut to let all the pain go. How can it go away if its not from cutting myself

    • Hello Anna,
      Thank you for reaching out. We are here to listen and help. Cutting is an addiction that is hard to overcome without help. We have a partner that will help you with the need to self-harm.
      You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST.
      Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
      You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)
      Take a chance and reach out to Door of Hope for help. You will be glad you did. They have helped many people we have sent them overcome the desire to cut and self-harm.

  152. I stop cutting for a few weeks or days then i started again I don’t want to do it but it gets the best of me and i need help. Also, i can’t stop being so negative. I am wonder if someone can help me.

    • Nathan, Thank you for reaching out. Without help overcoming the addiction to self-harm is very difficult. We are here to listen and help. We have a partner that will help you with the need to self-harm.
      You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST.
      Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org.
      You can email them to doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)
      Take a chance and reach out to Door of Hope for help. You will be glad you did. They have helped many we have sent them overcome self-harm.

  153. I have never actually cut but I used to scratch up my thighs with my nails really harshly for the longest time. Luckily I have support from friends and family to get me on the right track. I find that a hair tie on my wrist works well and talking to people I trust as well.

  154. I just wanted to say that I used to cut myself very frequently (nearly everyday) and I struggled for two years with self harm, but as of today I am four years clean of hurting myself. The urge is still there; I only stumbled upon this because I mistakenly found a razor I used to hurt myself with hidden in my bathroom and it triggered me a bit. I just want to let anyone who is reading this know that healing is real, help is real, and hope is real. I got out of that dark, dark cycle when I found God. I still struggle with depression but God has given me a purpose for my life and my church family is such an amazing support system for me. I couldn’t be more grateful that I got help when I did, and although my body is still littered with scars I will continue to keep fighting. Giving up this addiction, setting aside your pride and getting help, letting yourself be emotionally vulnerable to people who genuinely care…. it’s all worth it. You are so so loved. God bless.

    • Thank you for sharing your story! I realize not everyone’s will be as successful as yours, but it will give us all hope of what we can look forward to if we are strong.

  155. Hi,my Significant other has been cutting a lot with razors and shards of glass. She is 13… I made a promise that I would stop cutting for her. She said crap like “ok” or “yeah”. We had a big fight over it and how she cuts all the time. It’s been tearing me apart, I have no idea how to approach this crap. She means the world too me and I hate when she cuts. She also won’t accept any kind of help even from me… Please actually respond with something that will help.

    • Carl,
      Thank you for wanting to help your significant other overcome cutting. Self-harm is an overwhelming addiction and she may not realize she is addicted to it from reading her response to your help. It’s important for her to realize the destructive addiction she in. The desire to cut comes from deep wounds. Many times it comes from self esteem issues. Tell her she is valuable, worthy and that she matters. We have a partner organization, Door of Hope, that specializes in Self-Harm and has recovery coaches available. You can contact them to get specific ways to help her. She may be open to talking to them too. Please visit https://www.thehopeline.com/partners/door-of-hope-4-teens/ for more information about them and their number to text to talk to a recovery coach. Carl, we are proud of you for trying to help her, we hear your frustration, however it is ultimately her decision to seek help.

  156. Hi My name is Dynasty I cut all the time no matter how hard I try I can’t stop I tell myself every day when I go to sleep “Please Don’t wake up tommorow” and every morning I wish I hadn’t it’s been so bad I’ve have had therapists, counseling, social workers, I tried drawing on myself, I’ve been to may facilities so many different methods nothing working is it that bad that I can’t be helped ?

    • I meant mental faculties

    • Dynasty,
      You are valuable and worthy. We are proud of you for reaching out for help. Self-harm is an overwhelming addiction and recovery is not always easy. It’s good you have tried to overcome it through therapists and counseling. Please keep trying. Never give up because you matter, your life matters. We have a partner organization, Door of Hope, that specializes in Self-Harm and has recovery coaches available. You can contact them to get specific ways for help. Please visit https://www.thehopeline.com/partners/door-of-hope-4-teens/ for more information about them and their number to text to talk to a recovery coach.

    • Have you tried writing encouraging words on your wrist? Like strong, able, amazing, etc.?
      It really helps me!

  157. I have a lot of trouble not cutting. The only reason I don’t is for my mom. But it’s getting hard, I don’t know what to do.

    • Chelsea, Please know you are valuable and worthy! Overcoming the desire to cut without help is very hard to do. We are proud of you for reaching out for help. We have a partner organization, Door of Hope, that specializes in Self-Harm and has recovery coaches available. Please visit http://www.thehopeline.com/partners/door-of-hope-4-teens/ for more information about them and their number to text to talk to a recovery coach.

    • Same exact reason

    • Ya it’s hard but I try best not to cut

  158. I have been having bad depression and it has caused me to cut myself it makes me feel a little better I’m stuggling not cutting myself

  159. Thank you and God bless you.

  160. I wish my boyfriend did not always check my wrists. I wish I was not up at 4 am looking up ways to avoid cutting. I wish I felt I had somebody to go to other than some catholic self help website but it’s where I am in life. I wish I had a me. I wish I could hug myself and tell myself I’m being dumb and young and I am putting myself in this nobody else did. I wish I could run my fingers through my hair at times like this and tell myself I don’t need anybody to go to because I am okay. I wish I could rub my back while I cry and squeeze myself so hard just to feel that somebody finally got it somebody was finally there not just present but there. I wish I didn’t do this to myself. But this is life. And we are all commenting on here like it will really change anything. This website didn’t do …. for any of you. You are doing it for yourself. We just have to come to terms with it and learn that we r in control not the knife and not the sad times. I’m sorry. I talk when I’m confused and alone. If you did read this, though, thank you for hearing.

    • No matter how you feel about searching for help here, please know that we care and we are here to listen. It is okay to ask for help, it is okay to feel lost and alone in your struggle with self-harm. It is okay to admit your vulnerable. Life is messy and life can really suck sometimes. You are only human and you may feel like reaching out for help will not change anything, however, it is the first step to recovery. Would you take a chance and reach out to our partner organization that specializes in self-harm? They are called Door of Hope and they have recovery coaches available for you. You can text them at at 1-803-570-2061 (Alternative No. 914-393-1904) Texting is available Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday 8:30 – 10:30 EST. Their website is http://www.doorofhope4teens.org. You can email them at doorofhope4teens@gmail.com (answered in 24/48 hrs)
      Take a chance and reach out to Door of Hope for help. Many that we have sent to them have started on the road to recovery and overcoming self-harm. You matter and you are heard.

    • Dang that was so relatable and I’m sorry for whatever you are going through

  161. I just barely cut my self. Not my arms, but my thighs. I have a lot in common with this girl, I just hide it a lot better. I have a boyfriend and he is the main reason I’m not dead, I’ve tried to kill myself a few times, but my boyfriend helped me not to. I suffer with major depression and cutting myself. I can’t control it. I’ve been seeing a counselor for three years, and it only helps a little bit. But I just saw this website, and I already feel as if this information will help a lot. I had my mom hide everything sharp and dangerous, but I just had a meltdown and hid in our family car. I got curious and started looking around the car, and found a pocket knife. I cut myself, then came to my senses and gave the knife to my mom. But, I just can’t control my emotions. It’s like there are two parts of myself, evil and my true self but the evil is taking over. It is horrible! Just needed to tell someone.

    • Olivia, We are proud of you for reaching out for help. It takes a lot of courage to overcome the issue of cutting. We have a partner organization that can help you. They have recovery coaches available that you can talk to via text email or phone. For information how to reach them go to: https://www.thehopeline.com/partners/door-of-hope-4-teens/ We believe in you and you are not alone. You can overcome!

  162. It kind of does suck, I have a 2 year old and I started cutting before him and after I had him, it’s so hard, I get so depressed at night and I cry (not the heartbroken upset sad cry) but the cry of you can’t take it anymore and I have the biggest urge to cut and have the worst thoughts and it’s so hard to control it but every time I want to I have to think about how my son would need me, it just sucks I have no one to talk to, my mom said if I do it then she’ll put me in a mental home, and she doesn’t understand what’s it’s like, no one does

  163. i haven’t started to cut but I really want to
    life is hell and i want to die. someone help me . I can’t tell my dad, he doesn’t understand

    • Hi Charley,
      Just wanted to say I don’t know you, but I’m glad you’re here. I’m not going to deny or gloss over the feelings of hurt and despair you have–being depressed sucks, no way around it. But please know there are people in this with you, and this crappy fight isn’t one you have to do alone.

    • Hi Charley,
      I felt the same way at one point in my life until I realized that expressing myself and showing my feelings was the best way to fight that urge. I stop thinking about what people thought about me because the reality was that I needed to help and accepting you need it is the first step. I encourage you to talk to someone about how you feel. I hope you feel better ❤️

  164. Hi I am a cutter. I’ve cut so much on my arm.n now my boss says am not allowed 2 do my job as it’s working with children. I really enjoy this job so I really need 2 stop can any help me please x

    • Hey, I was kind of in your shoes I will ago. I’m not a teacher, I’m still in school. I used to cut and to me, it was my way of escape from everything, but, eventually I realized I couldn’t keep doing this, and I needed to stop. I needed to find a reason, so I texted one of my most trusted friends telling them what I had been doing. She said she cared for me so much I couldn’t understand. I felt the same way, and every time I wanted to cut, or had an urge to cut, I reminded myself of those text messages. Find something or someone in your life to keep pushing you forward. You don’t need to to tell them you’ve cut, but having people around that love you or distracting yourself with things you love, is my way of coping with things. If you feel no one loves you, your 100% wrong. I’m not going to say your my best friend in the whole wide world, but I’m not going to say your nothing either. Even though I’ve never met you, I still care for you. Your living and breathing the same air as me, your alive at the very same moment as me and your trying to push forward just like so many others going through the same thing in this world. People have no idea what kind of impact they make with others. I ADORE all my teachers and would be incredibly sad if they left. You are an example to shape young minds, even if kids talk during lessons or there just downright annoying, it’s not because of you, they still care for you even though it may not seem like it. People care for you, even small acquaintances you have with others. You matter and you should keep telling yourself this. You make a huge impact and I want you to stay on this earth forever.
      I hope this helped, it may not be the best advise but this is how I slowly learned to stop. I really hope you stop and are able to get back to your job.
      We all love you, trust me!

    • I also work with children and I think of it as a privilege! Children are the innocents of us! I have cut for 19 years and I have hid behind every shadow! Remember life is given to us and we must earn it! Don’t shed your blood no more because all of us have some kind of pain and I give You my support

  165. In the past year I’ve had those thought again, those thoughts I thought I left behind years ago. I’ve noticed they come to me when I feel overwhelmed with a situation I don’t know how to deal with. I have a family now and they are honestly my strength. I don’t want to feel like a left them being a coward. It’s been hard to not think it but I think writing here is going to release some of those urges. Life isn’t easy and I’ve learned that the hard way. Reading all the comments here and feeling everyone’s pain has helped me understand that I need to reevaluate my thoughts and treasure the years I’ve gone without them.

    • Hi Maria,
      I also thought I left those thoughts and urges way behind in my teen years, but recently my husband of 7 years, monogamous partner of 13, asked me for an open marriage because monogamy isn’t for him anymore. Just like that every urge and negative self opinion came flooding back into me like a dam that was finally released. You’re not alone. Strength and love to you, to us both <3

  166. To those who do not and don’t feel the truth! Yes I can say that! I have been trapped In this world for 19 years! The very first time I cut when I was 16 years old ! I am now about to hit 35! You see I was raped when I was 16! It took my soul! I continued to cut over the years just to release some kind of pain. I always slit the same arm all down it! I have many scars and guess what happened… exactly 1 month ago I became manic depressant and I sliced my arm to the point of needing 8 staples in my arm! I cut myself a total of 15 times on the same arm! I also have cut my legs as well over the years! I had to finally say this is enough! I just can’t do this every single day! I loved watching the blood flow out of my arm but it hurt me and my 2 kids! I woke up in a psych hospital completely blacked out! I have now been a solid month without a single cut! Please find your purpose in life and LIVE! No more blood shed!!

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